NOTE: these are all 100% real statuses made by 99.9% sane people. in other words....my friends and I are crazy.
ENJOY!
........................food — feeling annoyed that a giant pigion swooped down stole my chocalate turned into a penguine quacked like a duck, fell into a hole, transformed into a dragon, burnt the whole world then became a................pineapple.
Sitting on the couch watching my sister use my computer. She was on some account thing when I looked at her name on top of the page.
Me: Wait... you have a middle name, since when.
Her: Rachel, I've always had a middle name.
Me: .... really?
Her: -.-
AND IM JUST LIKE WHAT! — feeling confused.
So it was really silent in the bathroom because of another school that was in there.
Leejaye: Rachel its so awkward in here.
Me: Shut up Leejaye your ruining the awkward silence.
Leejaye: ....... -.- — feeling amused.
Missed the bus at school so Tina, Ria and I start walking to the next stop, we reach the last corner.
Me: Hey isn't that G-10
Tina: Yeah it is.
Drives past us...
Ria: Wait what thats the bus we need to take.
Tina and Me: O.O............ RUN RUN RUN!!!!!!!! — feeling exhausted, and quite amused with our stupidness.
Does anybody else wake up in the middle of the night thirsty as hell, and the water somehow tastes like it came from God's personal garden and river? No? Just me? Okay #OhHWaterWhyAreYouSoTastyAndHoly
Do you want to build a snowman? Australia: Wtf is snow? Well then, guess were building a sandman guys. Do you want to build a sandman? It Doest have to be a sandman. — feeling Bedazzled because its hotter than satans butthole
*Goes to see the remainings from yesterdays fire*
Me: "Man this place burnt down really badly, i hope everyone got out"
Dannielle: "Huh wha? Oh yeah, but look that poor Buzz lightyear, he's all burnt
.... Nows not the time to worry about Buzz Dannielle -.-
I just love how my mum can talk to anyone in my family for hours on end and smile so much while on the phone to ppl.
......Yet when I try and talk to my cat for 5 seconds coz I'm so alone, he turns around, rubs his balls on my face, and walks off.... Wat .-.
Do you ever feel like Hugging someone so hard, that you start to squeeze them so tight they can't breathe? Then you start to grab onto their necks, gradually start to choke them while slowly grabbing a knife from your pocket and stabbing their stomach repeatedly till the blood comes gushing out like a squirting water fountain that overflows with magical unicorns jumping around and tinker-bell randomly farting out pixie dust??
Yeah?, me Neither...
So its dark in my room, sitting on my bed, and i have my headphones on really loud so i can barely hear anything...
*Mum creeps in and chucks 3 snake lollies on my face*
Probably didn't just have the biggest panic attack in my life...
