Have you ever felt like talking to someone, but you just shut yourself up cause you don't want to sound like a whining b***h?
Have you ever had someone tell you that you need to handle the crap that life gives you better? As if there's a blueprint for that.
How do you know that everything you felt was real?
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I've been here before.
The first time, I had a whole heart.
I gave it away thinking she'd hold it well.
She dropped it.
It was at that point that I realized just how fragile it was.
I was infuriated.
If I was a deity, I would have set the world ablaze.
If I was the grim reaper, I'd collect every dying soul without giving any chance for life to seep back into their lifeless corpses.
In a nutshell, I was pissed.
Then you came along.
I don't think you know what you did.
We were just friends.
But I felt a spark.
The kind of spark that lights a match.
A tiny spark; but it counts.
You calmed me down.
You made the deity side of me sit back down.
You made the grim reaper retreat to his darkness.
But you were just a friend.
My mistake, was falling for you.
You warned me.
You told me you would break me.
These are words that I'm so used to.
EVERYONE can break me. Apparently.
EVERYONE doesn't get it.
EVERYONE thinks it's as easy as 1-2-3.
I'm told I'm better off being alone.
To everyone who says that; fuck you. How hypocritical. Before this, you were all looking for a fire. You found a fire but you couldn't feel the heat. You saw both sides of the coin. You didn't like what you saw. Now you come to me and say "yo, just build your own fire" UH, NOPE!!! I ALSO WANT KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO FIND A FLAME. Besides, how will give my kids advice on this shit.
I think the most disheartening part about my case is the fact that you are all scared of me. At least that's how I've interpreted it.
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And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why I hate being alone. My thoughts get irrational. Damn.
