Why do we need love? What is it? Why do we fight so hard to get it? Why do we shower one person with it, knowing very well that it isn't going to be reciprocated? Why is it hard to pull away from someone after falling for them? Maybe I can answer the last one; you jump into this abyss, blindfolded, hoping you'll be caught. You realize that it was a feeble attempt once you hit rock bottom. Injured, confused, scared, there's only one way to go; up. But you can't just leave, you've got broken bones, you've got fear cloaked in anger, you've got a shattered heart. Heal. Don't move or you'll worsen the damage. It's dark down there, there's just you and your thoughts.
But that's what darkness is. Mark Twain said It cannot be seen, cannot be felt,
Cannot be heard, cannot be smelt,
It lies behind stars and under hills,
And empty holes it fills,
It comes first and follows after,
Ends life, kills laughter.
Sometimes, I look in the mirror and see who I fell for. I look her right in the eye and whisper; "I hate you for this. How could you let me get this way? Why didn't you stop me? Now I have to rip off a piece of my heart just to get over you! I f***ing hate you!!! The heart dwells where it's moist!! You should know how hard it is for internal wounds to heal!!!"
In my bouts of anger, I hit the mirror, and bloody my knuckles. I look up and see her tears. I remember what we had prior to this. We were friends. I lost my best friend because I couldn't see past the dagger she stabbed me with. I lost my best friend. I'm not going to lose another.
