My Little Decoy

♪ I'll Take the Truth at Any Cost ♪ {40}

"'Cause we are broken
What must we do to restore
Our innocence
And oh, the promise we adored
Give us life again
'Cause we just wanna be whole

Tower over me
Tower over me

And I'll take the truth at any cost." - We Are Broken

---

I don't know what brought me here; I don't understand why my hand was balled into a fist, clenched so tightly they were turning a startling shade of white. I don't get why my fist was currently poised against the surface of Tilted Reality's bus door, or why I took a steady breath and rapped softly on the exterior. Yet as I waited with bated breath, as the seconds passed by agonizingly slow and the door remained as shut as it was when I first knocked, I realized why.

 The conversation I had with Xander made me realize what exactly I had to do, even if I didn't want to do it at all. It was time to give up. No, that sounds pessimistic and negative.

 It was time to let go.

 I had to let go of my past, and the things that I managed to screw up in the present. I had to set things right before I left and picked up my sentence again once I returned home to Marco. I thought back to my moment with Xander, recollecting our final bits of conversation.

----

"Am I the only one who knows?"

 "Mike knows," I replied, leaning my head against his shoulder as we sat side by side at the edge of the stage. He swung his legs and I watched the movements, biting my lip. "It's how he got me to help him."

 "Really?"

 "To be honest, I thought he was blackmailing me the entire time, since I didn't know his true intentions until a few days ago."

 "True intentions?"

 I paused, unsure whether or not to go on. It seemed like it wouldn't matter at that point; the world was going to find out eventually. Taking a small breath, I replied, "He needed my help with Tilted Reality."

 After seeing one look at his confused expression, I finally explained the whole complication with Tilted. Xander's eyes grew wide at the tale, and more than once his jaw dropped in shock.

 "Is that why..."

 "Why what?" I adjusted my position so that I was more comfortable, the cool breeze blowing through my hair. I was thankful for it in the hot weather.

 "The tickets," he mused, "that's why you have the tickets."

 "Bingo."

 He tensed; I felt it in his shoulders, making me draw my head away and peer at him curiously. "Are you- are you going to use them?"

 My heart dropped slightly and I reached into my pockets, feeling the edges of the tickets inside scraping my fingertip. "I don't know yet. Probably not. Too much has gone into these things."

 "Does Blake know?"

 "About what?"

 "Anything. The ordeal with Mike. Your situation with Marco? The tickets? How you were just using him?"

 This time I was the one who tensed and I lowered my head, massaging my temples. "Maybe it's best if he doesn't know."

 "Lace, if anyone has a right to know, it's him."

 I snorted, "And since when did you give a rat's ass about him?"

 "I don't," Xander mused thoughtfully before swinging his gaze to me, "But you do."