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When Bella went home that night, she hadn't even stepped into her room before Edward was saying, "So? Hanging out with my bitch of a sister went well?" Bella sighed and dropped her backpack right next to her door. She looked over at him sitting on the bed, playing with the fidget spinner Mike had given to her as a Christmas present the previous year before they got so popular. "These are stupid, what even is the point to this silly human device of distraction?"

She sat down on the corner of the bed and let out a huff. "I seriously cannot think when I'm around her. I become deadass emo, Eddie. It's so annoying."

"I know! I could hear you. You're pretty human to me, Rosalie! Let me love you or better yet, how about you love me!" he imitated her voice. She had nothing to throw at him so she growled the best she could. He chuckled, spinning the wheels again. "And your lips!" Bella scowled. "You're actually wearing makeup! Let me tell you, when I saw you in the red lipstick through her eyes, I swear I turned into the Mr. Krabs reaction meme. I was...shook."

Bella snorted. "You have a fidget spinner and you just used the word 'shook.' Your nineteenth century ancestors are quaking in their unreadable graves."

Edward chuckled, setting down the fidget spinner. "You've got me there." He raised an eyebrow. "Why are you, how do you say it...coming for me all of a sudden? I thought you were happy you had time to spend with Rosalie."

"I always come for you, you know this." Edward nodded. "And I'm really glad I did but I don't think I'll survive our next interaction without spontaneously combusting into laughter and memes."

He shrugged and kept a smile on his face. "Bella, my sister is having the best influence over you and I couldn't be more grateful. You just need to learn how to control yourself around her."

"Yeah, says you who doesn't drink human blood and is totally amazing at the whole 'self-control' thing."

He shrugged again. "As long as you don't jump to the first possible chance to ask her to marry and change you."

Bella's eyebrows jumped upwards and turned to him with a grimace. "Marry me? Marriage is so...weird."

He let out a soft chuckle. "I'm glad we never dated. Imagine me asking you to marry me around this point. You'd flat out say no and walk away. That would be really crazy. I hope Rosalie can deal with you being afraid of a commitment for six hundred years before agreeing to it."

Bella giggled and went over to her mirror to take off the lipstick which left a cherry stain. She turned off her lamp light and jumped into bed to snuggle up next to Edward. Sure, she didn't like touching him but when she was tired, it was all she craved. Edward wrapped his arms around her and added the tiniest bit of pressure.

She closed her eyes and then opened them again as something caught onto her thoughts. "Did she and Emmett ever...?"

"Fornicate?"

Bella burst out into fits of giggles, him joining her. She hid her face in his chest to keep the sound from waking Charlie up.

When he gained the restraint to laugh, Edward said, "Well, as you know, Rosalie saved Emmett from a bear attack and with that he became a fuck boy trying to get her to fall for him but it was just stupid puppy love until he realized it was him idealizing her. So, no, they never did anything rated R."

She released a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. Bella knew she was a weird dumbass for forgetting how to breathe but she was clumsy in terms of everything else so it wasn't impossible for that to be added to the list. She closed her eyes. "Good. I'm ready to start sliding into her DMs."

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