Fake Smiles // Michael Clifford

two

"I wish I had bigger boobs." I sighed at my best friend, Kendall.

"There is this one pill you can take.. You have to take it three times a day. I want to order them but my mom will probably find them and yell at me. I'll find a way to get them." She laughed to herself.

"Which one?" I held up two movies in front of Kendall's face.

"We are definitely not watching the Pokèmon movie. It's so stupid." She groaned, taking her eyes off of me and looking back at her phone.

"It is not stupid. You're just not cool enough for it."

"Whatever. Let's just watch Netflix then, I need to catch up on Bob's Burgers." She mumbled, while she threw her phone to the end of the bed and sat up against the wall, grabbing my xbox controller.

"I hate that show! Play something else!"

"And I hate Pokemon. Plus, you only like that show because Michael likes it."

I gave her the finger.

"That is so not true and you know it."

"Whatever, I'll just see what's on tv. Maybe some re-runs of pretty little liars are on, they usually always have them."

-----

Entry - October 5th

Life is fucked up. You can't be who you want to be without getting judged, and honestly I'm so fed up with it.

I want to drop out of school. I hate all of my classes, my teachers, all of the people in my school. Nobody there has a limit. They just never stop trying to make you feel absolutely terrible about yourself, never. They push, and push and push until you feel like shit.

I feel like nobody cares, except for Michael. He probably cares, just a bit. But then again it's probably just an act, who would want to care about me?

{End of entry}

Groaning in frustration, I grabbed my head. I had such a bad headache and all I wanted to do was sleep, but I couldn't.

I grabbed my phone and started a new text:

TO : Michael

"text me I'm bored"

A few minutes pass and he still hasn't replied. Setting my phone down, I run down the stairs and make popcorn.

After 5 minutes go by, I'm running back up the stairs with two steaming hot popcorn bags in my hands.

"Ow!" I hiss. There is a red mark on my hand where the popcorn bag burnt me.

"Here," I say, tossing a bag of popcorn at Kendall.

"Do you think Cody is going to ask me to prom?" Kendall questioned, tearing open her bag of popcorn.

"Honestly? I'm not sure. I'm really bad at telling other peoples feelings. Have you guys even had a real conversation yet?"

"Well, a few times. He kept talking to me in Algebra on Friday, and he was basically blocking out all of his friends because he was too busy with me. I'm not completely sure but I know he was being flirty. Because when someone flirts.. you can tell." She sighed, pausing her show.

"Again. I'm shit at telling feelings. Have you texted him? I saw him getting really friendly with Saidi before school so...is that something you should worry about? Maybe he'll ask her to prom."

"No. No he won't, because they broke up two months ago. And trust me I know he wont." She pointed her finger at me and scowled. "You really do suck at telling feelings because I know he's gonna ask me."