Feeling Love

chapter 6

We arrived at our destination in little less than an hour . Sam looked at me as he turned off the engine.
"Are you sure you want to do this." ,He asked me.

"I'm sure."

We walked into the building and asked around for the right flat , once we found it Sam told me that I should go in all one and I was thankful for the privacy.
I knocked at the door and an old woman opened it.
I awkwardly smiled and said,
"Hi , I'm really sorry to disturb you but my mother used to live with you 13 years ago. ''

The coffee cup she was holding earlier now lay shattered on the floor.

''You're Sophia's daughter. You're alive . Oh my Lord!"

Saying that she hugged me and invited me in. We had tea together and I found out her name was Jill and about her children living abroad.

"Can you tell me about my mom.", I  blurted out suddenly.

She put down her cup and smiled at me.

"Look alizae your mom led a really tough life after your father left her. It was really hard for her to survive but she had you. She loved you alizae . You were everything for her, but then you're dad came back . He didn't know about the pregnancy and when he found out about you , he didn't want you to grow up like your mother .
"Wait, what did my mother do?"I questioned.

"She was a prostitute." She said.
I stayed silent .
"Your mother changed after you were born , she found a job as a waitress, she had a place to stay. She was happy. Really happy. ''

"What happened then?"

"Your mother came home one day and told me that she was leaving. She had you tucked under one arm and was in a hurry. I didn't hear from her after that."

Jill started crying, as she spoke again
Then one day a person came here , he told me your mother had di...ed. They didn't even know why she died , she was just found dead . We buried her in st Martin's graveyard and a year later it blew up."
I listened as she continued.
"I don't know why everything bad had to happen to your mother, she was such a nice girl."
I hugged her as she started sobbing again, and a  tear made it's way down my cheek.
We sat like that for a long time before Jill pulled back.
"Your mother used to write a diary.", She said as she wiped her cheeks.

"I sent it to your fathers address in Pakistan."

I looked inside my snapback and found the diary , the BOOK that had come with her letter.
I kept it close to my chest as it was the last thing left of my mother.

Jill stayed silent for some time and then got up and brought some cookies.

I sat there when suddenly I was hit by the fact that I had to go back home today. Back to Pakistan, back to the damn hospital. I didn't wanna go. 
I got up and told Jill that I was leaving now .
"Do come and visit me , you're like my granddaughter."

I smiled and hugged her .
As I left I felt a strange dizziness envelop me. I sat down on the stairs and took another dose of my medicine. Walking downstairs I saw Sam waiting for me.
He ran up to me and bombarded me with questions
'Are you okay, did you find out about her, are you having another headache."

I laughed at Sam and he sheepishly smiled .

"I'm fine", I said.

He drove me back to the hotel and I thanked him for his help
"Not a lot of people are willing to help strangers like that you know."

"Thanks a lot".

"Don't mention it."

" So what's the plan now?",he asked
"I'm leaving right now"

'Can't you stay a little longer.?"

"Nah my brother will be worried."

"Okay."

"Yeah."

I hailed a taxi from the hotel but Samuel was insistent on driving me to the airport.
As he drove , I felt the dizziness again and an urge to throw up again
"Stop the car ." I said

"What ?"

"Stop it."

Sam pulled over and I got out.
The minute my feet touched the concrete so did the contents of my stomach.
I saw blood everywhere. On the floor on my hands. The world had started to fade away. I could hear Sam screaming away on his phone . I lost all sight as my head hit the ground and everything went black.
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Nothing matters when you know you're about to die , not pain not peace all that matters is love.