Is This Love?

October 16th

WARNING: COULD BE INTENSE VIOLENCE/GORE AHEAD! If you are okay with this then please continue, if you're not then I apologize.   

               I did it.

               I did it all for nothing.

               That is all that has been going through my head. Today it all broke out, everything flooded out of my head, leaving nothing to make sense. I had to speak to her and I had to hear the Intriguing voice of hers, see her small sweet innocent smile light up as she became friends and someone new. That new person would have been me. Yet nothing happened the way I expected it to, I slowly calm down before going up to her. My nervous walk began to become sturdy as I got closer. I began to play practice interjections in my head trying to find the perfect one for the perfect girl. This was the day I was going to make Delilah my friend the only friend I needed. I walked up to her but she stood there as if nothing was there as she could see through me as if I was nothing but air. I begin to speak but she completely ignored me as if she had become deaf. She looked past myself to her friends, not me her friends, this was how it was going to end. But can't I change it? I could but yet I can't.
               Somehow her friends seemed to see me, she on the other hand saw nothing but the air around me. They stared at me as if I was an animal at the zoo on exhibit, as if I was the only black sheep in a white herd, they stared as if I had a tail in ears like a fox even like I began to breathe fire.
               They were talking to her so easily, they had begun to take what I worked so hard to earn. The things I had deserved, the one I deserve. She blew me off for those things that call themselves friends? I can be a real friend they cannot I will show her exactly what we are friends can do. They will be replaced no matter how many times I have to replace them I will.
My only stump in the road, the only hole in my path, the only way to build that bridge, I didn't know how. I don't know how I'm going to replace all of them but I can start with one. To where they can't intrude again. Ever again. She will have eyes for me and only me. Nothing can ruin it, no one ruin it, I made a plan that's going to be followed. No one can stop me and no one will.
               We will become one.