Jaded Romance-The Mentalist

Chapter Four

Teresa had waited so long to just hear some form of compliment from him, one that didn't embarrass her too much. And then he goes and throws a well improvised monologue at her. She studied his face as it washed through a variety of emotions and expressions. Desperation, to hopefulness, to deep longing, then finally settling on regret.

"Come here, you silly thing," she croaked out. She pulled him in for a hug and rested her nose just above his shoulder so she could still consume the much-needed air, her mouth tightly pressed against his suit jacket. "You'll be fine," she insisted. He broke away and looked at her.

"What do I need to do to prove myself?" He asked desperately.

"You're my friend, correct?"

"Of course I am, aren't I?"

She nodded her head once and continued. "Then you want what's best for me?.."

This time he took a little longer to reply. "I do."

She took a deep, slow breath and exhaled gently. "Then... Help me figure out what is best for me?.."

He reeled back in shock, he'd thought she was going to say that the best thing for her was to move to DC with Pike.

"Surely you know my opinion on the situation?.."

"I know your opinion, yes." She stopped abruptly and finally picked her gaze up from the floor. "But your feelings on it? I don't think I do..."

He wasn't entirely sure what she was getting at. Well that's a lie he told himself. I know what I'm meant to say, and I know what I want to say. But was he ready to say it? He wasn't certain. That's a lie again. It was more a case of, how did he say it? He didn't want to finally say it, and for her to not be expecting those feelings.

"What... Feelings would you like me to express? Ones of wanting to keep you here, all to myself? Or ones of wanting to let you go, so you can be happy?"

He definitely hadn't worded it like that in his head, and clearly she hadn't either. Her lips seemed to part and then snap shut again several times before any sound would come out.

"Me to be happy?.." She muttered, knowing she wanted the answer to the other feelings that included her all to himself...

"Well... Uh... I want you to be happy," he stated. When he realised she was expecting a better answer than that, he rethought over the many times he'd considered telling her... "And... I don't know what, or who, makes you happy anymore..." He just needed a subtle hint from her, something that would tell him that the feelings he knew she'd once carried for him were still there, and more to the point, still wanting to be acknowledged and acted upon.

"You're the psychic, you tell me," she challenged, although still remaining serious.

"Well... Marcus had some form of effect on you, and I think he made you happy for a while." He felt worried that he'd hit a nerve any second and she'd refuse to listen to anymore. "But I think you've noticed that he isn't the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?"

She fiddled with her fingers as she registered his words. He was right, of course. "How do you know that, Jane?.." She questioned, wanting him to admit deep secrets. "I know it's blatantly obvious that I'm unsure of it all, but... What I'm trying to say is... How can you be so confident that it's true?"

He watched her as she tried to explain herself, the little line between her brows indicating the stress she was battling with.

"I pay keen attention to detail."

"And what is the detail with me?"

"Your smile."

"My smile?" She says incredulously.

"Yes. Plus you have a strong telltale trait... For a start, when you're truly content, you don't have the line between your eyebrows."

She suddenly dropped her face back to neutral, ironing out the little dent he had talked about.

"Okay. So what if my best option was to stay?"

He was knocked off guard, due to the talk about feelings and thoughts, he very rarely had to voice them. Wow, now what does he answer? He sometimes forgets he's talking with a cop who holds interrogations with some of the most arrogant people out there on a daily basis.

"Well I would have to, uh-ju-mm..." he paused and thought, not for long, but long enough for her to pull her act together.

"I'm fed up of this, Jane. Say whatever the hell it is and get it over with," she ordered. The past ten years had given her confidence about dating a hard hit, taking chip after chip every time she spoke to him. She was so used to hoping for him to say something, and it never happening that she'd grown familiar with the circumstances and how they ran. He'd begin with a heartfelt comment, she'd raise her hopes, and then nothing would be said, and her confidence would take another knocking. It had gotten to the stage where she wouldn't even consider the possibility of him admitting anything, her mind would simply forget to do so.

"Fine," he broke out, into the bubble of silence that surrounded them in the dark parking lot. The fluorescent 'open' sign flickering on and off in the background. Nearby street lights and the hazy glow of the moon being the only other sources of light. "I need you here. Now, more than ever. And this sounds incredibly selfish of me. To want you to stay simply because I said so. But you have no idea, Teresa. No idea... The thought of losing you again, for the fifth time... It hurts, physically and mentally. I don't want to say something, to say the thing that's been niggling away inside of me, expanding each day I see you, because I fear that it'll cause you more trouble than you realise and it will make your decision more difficult. I want you to make this decision for you. No body else, not Pike, and most certainly not me."

With only a split second after he'd finished she answered, "Just say it."

He gazed at her, wanting to know if he had to, and the stern, but caring look, she gave back was the answer and signal he'd needed all along.

"I want you to stay...because I can't picture me here without you. I need you by my side. In more ways than you can imagine..."

He watched her face again, tracing the outline of each dainty feature. If this was the last time he was going to be alone with her, then he needed a clone of her in his head to help him through the days and to guide him when he felt alone.

She had her head bowed to the ground and her eyes darted aimlessly around the floor. That's when he suddenly knew exactly what would prove his point...

"Good luck, Teresa. Love you."