The Journey Thru My Life

The Beginning of a New Life

I walked into the apartment still trying to analyze the situation. Asher and I could be friends, but nothing more than that, that much was clear.
I was revered from my thoughts at the sound of my father's voice. "Well aren't we friendly with the neighbors?"he sarcastically chuckled. "Shut up" I said. "I'm just saying, Serenity is hate to have him hurt you or you hurt him"he mumbled. He hated sharing his feelings on the boy topic that much was sure. Every fathers dream, that their teenage daughter is out of the house before the hormones kick in. "Sure, sure,"I told him "by the way the whole over protective father gist, not a good look on you". "So you going to keep poking at my personal life or lead me to my bedroom" I said sarcastically. "Ya Serenity about that"he mumbled. "What?, I have a bedroom don't I?" I asked in a irritated tone. "Um hon follow me" he gestured with his hand for me to follow. I grabbed my blue backpack from the couch and followed trying to understand his discomfort. The whole Asher thing had no part in this, that I was sure of.
We walked down the narrow hallway. It took 5 steps to get to the bedroom. I looked up at my father's face trying to scrutinize it, but the expression he was wearing was unreadable. He was hesitant as he twisted the doorknob. When we entered the room I could see why. This would not be my room, it would be our room. How did I know this? The room was painted pink. Ugh. The room was bright pink, with roses painted all around, in the corner I saw a queen size bed, I knew it was mine because the sheets were lavender colored. Next to me was a bunk bed painted hot pink. With cotton colored sheets. How hideous. I was utterly disgusted. Out of all the colors of the rainbow theses children had to chose pink. " What is this!?" I shouted at my father. "It's your room"he said clearly trying to keep it together. "Excuse me!" "No it's not my room unfortunately it's our room, as in mine, and the wretched monsters you have for children" I lowered my tone, I preferred not to fight with him again knowing it wouldn't do either of us any good. "Ugh, you know what just get out I don't want to fight anymore" I said trying real hard to keep my voice even. He left without saying anything more. I opened my army green suitcase, and looked for my dark blue silk pajamas. Once I found them I stomped out of the bedroom, and I headed to the bathroom a foot across the hall. I slammed the door on my way out.
When I entered the bathroom I immediately categorized it as tacky. I snickered. I figured this was the work of my horrid step mother. It had a women's touch painted all over it. It was a light child like yellow, the ones that are used to paint a baby's nursery. It was covered in seashells, and starfish, the ones you only found at the beach. I hurried and got dressed, groaning when I remembered what was waiting for me tomorrow. School. I could only imagine what would be waiting for me. These kids all grew up together their families know each other I'd be the outsider, clearly a motive for talk. I groaned, and snickered at my thoughts. I took a deep breath before I stepped out the door.
The lights were on in the room, apparently my father snuck the 2 monsters in the room just to make sure I wouldn't lock them out. I chuckled cause he was probably right about that.
I hesitated at the door debating if I should knock or not. I was about to knock, but didn't cause I realized this was my room too. I walked in the middle of a bedtime story. I rolled my eyes this two where way too old for a bedtime stories. When I walked in all eyes were on me. I felt kinda sad. They really did look like the perfect family. The family in which I would never fit in. The family in which I was out of place. I felt a pit of inner sadness go through me. I realized at that moment that I would never fit in with this family, no matter how hard I tried, so why try at all. I walked to my bed to try to avoid the eyes that were on me. I layed in bed with my back to them, I couldn't stand to see the perfect picture family again. "Goodnight baby girl" said my father. I didn't respond acting as if I was too tired to answer. I could hear the whispers of the family. I even heard the footsteps of my father, and step mother when they were leaving. "Goodnight my beautiful angels"said my father.
The lights went off at that at that moment I realized I was silently crying. I was crying, because I never had a mother, and father that tucked me in at night, or that told me bedtime stories. I only had a mother, she was the one that tucked me in at night, and told me bedtime stories. I was truly envious of these children. They had the perfect life which they all seemed to be taking for granted. I didn't realize I was holding my mother's locket in between my thumb, and for finger until I felt the texture of the smooth golden paint. I was balling my eyes out. In my head I was thinking how could I ever be happy without my mother. She was the one person in this world that truly understood me. And she just left me, to face the world all on my own. I looked at the faces of my two siblings. I knew it wasn't their fault. But that didn't change how I felt about them. They live the life I can only dream about. They really did look harmless. The only reason they were afraid of me was, because this was as new to them as it was to me. The people I truly despised were my father, and step mother. I couldn't bring myself to forgive my dad for leaving me at birth, or my step mother for stealing him away from me. If it weren't for her, these last few years of my life I could have been happy, well happier. Because I was happy with my mother, but I would have been happier with having both my mom, and my dad by my side but it's too late now, this my life now, and I'd just have to learn to accept it. I went back to sleep, or tried to at least, and that night I cried myself to sleep. Thinking, and fantasizing about what my life would be like if I had the two of them by my side.
I woke up in the morning hoping the dream I was having was reality, it wasn't. In my dream I was in my backyard back home playing with my mom, and dad. Thier hands intwinted together. They were watching me as I watched them. Then I woke up into a nightmare, which was my reality. My bed was right next to the window, in it was a flash of sunlight, from inside I could hear the birds chirping. I used to like these type of things. The sunlight, the birds, and the bright blue sky. Ever since my mom died I hated anything that was pretty, or beautiful. I closed the curtains. When I rose from my bed I could see that the clock said 6:50. I trudged to the closet. I was deciding in between a red checkered shirt with blue jeans, or a yellow short sleeve shirt with blue jeans, when I heard the alarm clock ring. Ring!!!Ring!!!Ring!!!Ring!!! "Aww!!" The three of us yelled in unison. Apparently my siblings were caught off guard as well. I heard the heavy footsteps coming in from the hall. 10 seconds later my father barged into the room with a baseball bat in his hands. "What was that?!"he yelled, with my step mom, and Jay right behind him. Jay was carrying a baseball bat of his own. "Nothing dad I heard the alarm clock, and I freaked out". My father laughed his heart out."God forbid you get attacked by another alarm clock Serenity". He let out another hardy laugh. "Well then if you, and the alarm clock have sorted out your differences, you girls should get ready for school". He left the room taking my step mom, and Jay with him. I decided to go with the yellow short sleeved shirt, with the blue jeans. I hurried to the bathroom, and brushed out my tangled hair, and I brushed my teeth. My siblings were already dressed for school, and we're already sitting at the dinner table. The table was set up with waffles, and a variety of fruits, with orange juice. I took the seat next to Jay who was jumping up, and down in his high chair. Evie, and Sabrina were pretending not to stare at me, but whenever I looked away I could feel their eyes burning on me as if I was a new toy. They were studying me I could see that much from the corner of my eye. I wondered when that would wear off.
My father and step mother took their seats at the opposite heads of the table just as they had yesterday. Breakfast was a quiet occasion. My father spoke at the very end of it. "Serenity I can't accompany you to your first day of school but-" I cut him off short with my comment "There's a shock" I said sourly rolling my eyes. He continued as if I hadn't said anything. But I could see the surprised looks coming off my siblings faces. Apparently they were not allowed to talk back. "But I have arranged an escort for you". "An escort?" I asked annoyed. "Yes it's someone you know and like very much" he chuckled. I knew instantly who he was talking about, but I refused to think the name it was more then unhealthy for me. I didn't respond, my silence assured him I knew exactly who he was talking about. "Yes you guessed right, Asher". I threw him a dirty look . "Asher will be your escort without any complaint on your part" he smirked almost smug "treat him with as much hospitality as you did yesterday"he chuckled. I groaned, and got up from the table without permission. I stomped to the sink, and threw my breakfast dish into it. I stalked out of the kitchen into the bedroom, pushing the door out of my way, and slamming the door on my way out. I stomped my way to the front door. "Oh come on Serenity it was a joke!"my father shouted. "Serenity it's 7:30 Asher isn't coming to get you until 7:45"said my father. "Who said I needed Asher" I said in a sour tone. "Now don't go playing proud with me, you know you'll need assistance in getting to school, and help in navigating it" he sighed "Asher is a good kid I trust him, and I like him, and from what I can see so do you, so how about cooling it with the attitude". I rolled my eyes and snickered. "I mean it, I want you to be friendly towards him, do you understand me?"he asked. I heard the emphasis on the word friendly very clearly."Sure,sure" I mumbled.
Just then we all heard the knock on the door. I peeked through the hole in the door. "Well look who's early" I said in a tone that was both amused and sarcastic. My father sighed, and rose from his chair, and walked passed me, and to the door. He opened it with caution pushing me behind him as if he was trying to defend me from something. Out of all the somethings he had to protect me from it had to be a boy. "Why hello Asher"said my father in a serene voice "If I remember correctly I told you 7:45, and it's"my father looked down at the watch that he didn't have on. Asher finished the sentence "It's 7:35 sir" Asher's voice was as beautiful as ever. I was hoping that would have been gone by now. "I hope I'm not inconvenicing anyone"he was staring at me when he said this."Nope not at all" I told him in a calm voice. "Ready to go?"I asked him. "Hold up a minute, Asher do you remember the indications I gave you?" "Don't worry sir I'll take care of her"he responded. I snickered incoherently. "Okay well if your done playing the roll of the over protective father I'd like to get going" I said walking out the door. "Have a good day at school, Pumpkin"my father called as we walked down the stairs.
I waited till we were out of view to ask Asher what indications my father had given him."It's nothing too out the ordinary Serenity, but he just warned me that if I brought you back in less then perfect condition he left you in he'd cut my head off"we both chucked at that last part. "Can I ask you something?" "Sure Asher what's up". He came to a stop, and turned to face me. This was the first time I noticed what he was wearing. He had a white T-shirt with a black leather jacket, and blue jeans on,and his bronze hair was still as beautiful as always. He looked even more like a runway model then yesterday. I felt so out of place standing next to him. "Just don't get mad okay". "Okay"I said in a firm voice trying to sound confident and failing. "So um you noticed my timing at your front door was perfect,right?""Right"I said. "Well that was kinda of intentional""I heard you fighting with your dad,the walls in those apartments are really thin". He looked into my eyes as he said this. I'm not sure what he saw but he immediately looked down at his feet. He was wrong about me getting mad cause I wasn't, irritated maybe but not mad. "Asher I'm not mad,irritated maybe but not mad". He let out a sigh "Promise?" "Promise". He immediately picked up the pace. "Asher I'm sorry you had to hear that". "It's okay I get it if you don't want me around I'm not going to impose myself on you"his tone filled with sadness. "No Asher that's the opposite of what I want"."But with your dad,you said-". I cut him off "I know what I said,but I didn't mean it,I just like being on the opposing side of my dad". "Your just saying that,since I heard you" he said still sad. I turned him around to face me,I put my hands on his shoulders "No Asher I didn't mean anything of what I said about you,can you please trust me" I pleaded. He once again looked into my eyes and this time he liked what he saw because his reaction was different,instead of frowning he smiled. "Of course I can" he said. He checked his watch "Well we'd better get going if your counting on me to give you the tour of our grand school"he said with a bit of smugness and sarcasm. "Lead the way all mighty tour guide"I said in a playful and sarcastic voice. "So your sure you still want me around?" "More then sure"I told him. The next five minutes we were silent and I was trying to think of ways to stay away from Asher without hurting him. Asher didn't deserve pain escpecally if I was the one causing it. He made it so hard to not have feelings for him. But I knew that my league and his league were on totally different levels. "So ready for this?"Asher asked me. "As ready as I'll ever be" I responded back. I took a deep breath "well here goes nothing" I said under my breath incoherently as Asher and I opened the doors to the beginning of my new life.