(Billionaire Playboy) A Flower in Heaven - Zahra

6. When I want something, it is mine.

I didn't know how I drove home. I was only intending to drop Zainab. Over the last few weeks, I noticed Zainab in ways she never would have expected. When I am tired, I wanted her tea. And I would make her do something in my office so that her presence can calm me. She had noticed my hell bent on work approach, and sometimes she brings me some food like her cookies or some sandwich, so I take time to eat.

She was not personal nor was I. But I felt the mutual understanding. She touched me in a way no one has ever done. It is not lust or love. I don't know what it is. But kind of felt she has to be in my life at this time for me to breath.

When I agreed to drop her home, I was intending to do just that. But when I accidently held her hand, I didn't want to let go. No, i didn't want to let go even if Zainab wanted to. I am held it until i had enough of it.

But she didn't want me to. I know a thing or two about Islam. I know in Islam women are not handled causally. I had to kiss her delicate hand. So I kissed not once, twice  but 3 times. I feel quite good about it.

Zainab liked me. I know that. we are attracted, but there is something more than an attraction, and that is the thing I want to figure out. And first time it felt good to call someone "Babe" and "Love".

When she cried I knew what she was thinking. She was hurt I treated her exactly how a common man would treat. She thought I didn't see pass her face and that hurt her. The expression in her face could have killed me. But she understood. My girl understood what I am looking for. I am a happy man tonight.

I am threading on dangerous water. I am intended to marry well. I mean, I have to marry for connections especially political and economical. I cant settle for anything low. I have an empire to run. I am sure this phase will pass off soon preferably with no hard feelings from Zainab. I cant hurt her. She is especial.

I need to find an excuse to not pick her up tomorrow. Senator David is coming to Marthas' party. I have to go there hence to meet him and discuss some of the issues I am having now with regards to my business in Russia.  

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I know things are going out of hand. I am not the one who let people hold my hand no matter how especial they are if they are Non-Mahram. Stuart is a play boy millionaire. I am just a novelty. Unless I am careful, I will end up destroyed. He wont meant to hurt me but I will end up hurting nevertheless.

I have to find a new job. No matter how desperate I am for money, I don't compromise my moral and religious codes. I have to fake tomorrow with a sickness without hurting Martha. 2 hours in the car with Stuart is suicide. I know it.

I know I am beautiful. But men like Stuart doesn't marry nobody like me. He vine and dine with people who run the world. I have seen the sophistication of some of his friends who drop by at office and their spouses. I am not that. And never will be.

I will inform Martha that I am taking a friend with me. I will go with Anne. It is better politely decline Stuart for my sanity and his.

I opened my WhatsApp a feature I hardly use but if not use it now, when?

*Hello Stuart

**Hi Zainab

*Look, can we just forget about what happened today? You don't have to pick me up. I will go with a friend of mine. We need some distance before one of us get hurt.

**I agree. See you tomorrow.

That went well. But it also hurts. I don't know what I was expecting Stuart to say. I mean, I hope I wasn't expecting him to contradict me. But whom am I kidding?