I Have A Heart

The start of something beautiful

"Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create."

― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

"Bonjour mon Ami!" A burst of laughter erupted from the girl filming herself. "Just kidding! I don't know French whatsoever." She readjusted her pink pastel hoodie, so it could resume its previous position of at her sides. The hoodie itself swallowed her frame and the bottom of the sleeves were frayed. It was something cheap from the thrift store, but she loved it nonetheless.

"I'm Rebecca Humming... ya know like the bird?" She lifted her arms and pretended they were wings by her side, making a small whooshing noise. Her black hair covered one of her hazel eyes at the sudden movement. She quickly lifted her hand and swept it behind her ear.

"Anyway, I'm new to this whole youtube thing, and I can't wait to get started!" She bounced a bit in her seat and shook her hands in excitement. "Who knows all the crazy stuff we're going to get into." Her voice went up an octave slightly higher, and her smile was so wide, it hurt her cheeks.

"Well-" Rebecca stopped talking when she heard the start of heavy footsteps slowly coming up the stairs. Momentary fear crossed her features, but she quickly pushed the feeling of dread away and focused back on the camera. She'll have to make this quick.

"Until next time love ya!" She blew a kiss and shut off the computer quickly.

She picked up a nearby book and flipped to a random page, pretending to be busy. Her door slammed open and her father's frame quickly filled the doorway.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Her father suffered from bipolar issues. It never made what he did acceptable, but it made it easier for Rebecca to forgive him.

"J-just reading.." She played with the paper of the book, fearing she was about to enter a panic attack. Her father had groomed her in such a way, that as soon as she heard someone yelling at her, she would quickly go into a frenzy.

He snatched the book away and thew it at the wall, "Don't lie to me!" His voice shook the house and in three steps he had the collar of her pink sweater in his hands, bringing her to her feet, and lifting her off the floor.

"I heard voices in here..." He trailed off dangerously, and the door opened once again to reveal her step-mom. She was a dark-skinned woman, who only really cared about the money Rebecca's father made. She leaned against the doorframe and crossed her arms, choosing not to say anything, just watch. I mean, it wasn't one of her kids, so why should she care.

"I- I was practicing my lines for the next school play, thats all I promise!" The tears were flowing freely from the fifteen-year old's eyes. She hated this feeling of uselessness.

Her father rolled his eyes. "Whatever." He dropped the girl and she fell back, hitting the floor with a loud thump.

He left the room, with her mother trailing behind. Rebecca could hear them in the distance yelling curses at each other, and the sound of glass smashing in the kitchen.

She tried to desperately wipe away the tears, as she stood up on shaky feet. She had to make sure her siblings were safe... She had to. She opened their door and found all four of her younger siblings playing a game of monopoly, Completely unaffected by the screams "Are you guys okay?" "I'm Hungry Becca, can you please go get me food?" "uh," the screams from the kitchen seemed to grow louder.

"Would it be okay if you waited a little bit?"

"NO!" Her four-year-old sister stomped her foot in annoyance. "I'm hungry now!"

Rebecca sighed, taking off the pink flower crown from her head and placing it on her sisters. "I need you to wait... Please genesis, can you wait, for me?" Her sister pouted but silenced at once, enjoying the flower headband. Her brother Xavier was nine, Isabelle was ten, and Bella was eleven. Isabelle was her step-sister, but Rebecca loved them all the same. Her four older siblings had moved out as soon as they had the chance, so it left her as the oldest.

She sat on the floor next to Bella and Xavier. "Can I be the shoe piece?"

~ At school the next day~

"Hey, Rebecca what up?"

"Nothing but the sky my dude!" She dabbed (ironically of course) and her friends groaned in protests.

"Whatcha working on?" Mason plopped himself in the seat next to hers, and her other friend,Brooke, took the other.

"I'm just about to upload this new video! I was editing it all morning. Blah, this is actually a lot of hard work. Who knew, right?" Rebecca smiled brightly and played with the sleeves of her pink sweater.

She stood up from her chair and stretched, letting out a soft moan.

"Woah, god Rebecca you went sexual."

She rolled her eyes at Brooke, "Asexual meanie, leave me be." Mason smiled and put his elbow on top of her head. "Wow you're short, what are you 4'9?" Rebecca glared at him and stuck out her tongue. "I'm 4'11, don't be rude." She rubbed her hands together.

"Anyway, here we go." She smiled at her friends and hit the upload button.

It was such a small and insignificant video. Who knew it would blow up the way it did.