The Bad Boys Sister

Chapter 31

"You can run from what you feel as long as you want, but the emotions will always catch up with you."
~Unknown

I didn't stand up instead I nodded my head once and looked back down at the paper in front of me. My eyesight was getting blurry and it took everything I had to not let the tears fall out. I wanted to go to a place where nobody was at. I wanted to lay down and cry like the weak girl I am, but I can't. I knew the first time we moved that who I really am would have to stay hidden, and she wasn't aloud to come out.

"Get back to work," Jordan growled and I heard the shuffling of paper's. I don't know why he would get the attention off of himself, he always loves it. In that way, I sometimes wounder if Jordan is worse then Dawson. 

"I guess the unbreakable girl can break," Ally didn't say it nasty but in almost sadness. What did she think I was made of? Nobody can handle everything forever, everyone has a breaking point.

"Everybody breaks," I looked up to her eyes and she was taken back. I think she thought I was crying because she looked where the tears should be rolling off my cheeks. Instead, my eyes were dry and I probably looked dead tired.

Everybody got talking again and refused to look our way in fear of Jordan. I didn't blame them, he seemed very angry just a minute ago.

I felt a pull on my blue mechanical pencil which ruined my paper. I looked up to see Jordan's green eyes analyzing my face.

"Sorry I'm late," Dawson burst through the door making everyone laugh. His shirt was on backwards and his hair was a hot mess; we all know what he did.

"Nikki?" Jordan's voice was so low that I could barley hear him. I looked back to see him trying to hide his emotions like I was trying to do not so long ago. "I don't want to fight with you."

"I don't want to fight either," I spoke just as quiet. I saw Ally from the corner of my eye staring at the both of us reminding me what we were fighting about. "However, you shouldn't treat Ally that way. If you don't like her you shouldn't date her, if you like her than you should date her." I might not understand his situation but I knew enough that it was messed up what he was doing.

"It was her idea," Jordan sat up straighter. Ally quickly looked away which only made me grow more sad.

"It doesn't matter whose idea it was it's still messed up," I looked down at my calculus paper. It stopped making sense as my brain ran in a circled loop.

"Again stop judging people, you act like they are all going to hurt you. I don't know who messed you up this badly but we aren't all like that person Nikki." Jordan's words spoke truer than any words  have. However, he doesn't understand how many people contribute to me being who I am.

"Old habit's die hard," I spoke while finishing a bit over half the paper. I hate calculus but at the same time I loved it.

"Yes but they die," Jordan's words made me confused. Doesn't he realize that they don't die, they go away and try to wiggle themselves back into your life while your weak. Nothing ever disappears, everything comes back hard while you are in a weak moment.

"Babe?" Ally's voice sounded so sweet and it made my frown deeper. I really hope she doesn't think faking a relationship will end up the way they do in books. They won't end up together in high school, maybe when they are both older.

Jordan stared at me with longing eyes and an emotion flashed between his face to short for me to realize what he felt. He turned over to look at Ally as I shook my head and looked down at my worksheet. 

RING

I jumped out of my seat and began walking away as quickly as I could, granted I am wearing a maxi dress. Which my brother decided was what he could grab to stop me, and it worked. He didn't completely stop me, but just enough so he could walk next to me.