Baby Daddy. {Thatch x Reader}

Drunk Dad.

Well, you've had a terrible night. Newgate left you alone with Acey because he had some business at work to deal with and this wouldn't be bad at all if there wasn't some construction work going on up the road. 

It was keeping little Ace awake, the boy was crying all night and nothing would calm him. Of course, you didn't want to call Thatch and ruin his night so you started with the TV, trying to calm him with kid's shows but nope, didn't help. You then tried to feed him but he didn't want his bottle, he didn't want to play, he just wanted to cry and if you left the room for a second to find something else to try and sooth him with, he'd only cry louder.

It took you a solid hour to find a remedy, a video game of all things. One that each of the brothers have because they like to play it online together, hell you've even played it with them once. It's called Overwatch and the only way you managed to stop Acey from crying was to play and to play as a character named Mccree. 

The guy dresses a bit like a cowboy as does uncle Ace so that may explain it, however you're really bad with this character so you had to mute the teammates that were using their mics and hope they won't start yelling at you for doing so poorly.

As the night progressed the construction works stopped and Acey soon fell asleep. Well, that was until the front door bursts open, startling you in the process. "HOW DOES LUFFY HANDLE HIS DRINK BETTER THAN ME?! I'M OLDER AND IT'S HIS FIRST--"

"Shh yoi! You're being loud!" You recognize both of those voices, one is obviously Marco and the other is Ace. Although, the blonde is too late and baby Acey is awake and crying again. "Now look what ya did!"

Thanks, goons.

Surprisingly, the first to make it into the living room where you're sat is Sabo, the younger blonde offering you a polite smile as he paces over to his nephew before gently picking him up. "Hey there, lil' guy~" Sabo gently hums as he strokes the little brunette's cheek with his finger.

"Where's--?" Your unasked question answers itself when Thatch drags a very drunk Ace into the room. The freckled goon clinging to his older brother for dear life, rabbiting on about Luffy handling alcohol just about as good as a slug handles salt.

Why this?

"You're shittin' me if you're saying THAT is handling it better than me!" Ace barks with his index finger extended towards Luffy, who's currently being carried along by Marco, the older blonde once again shushing Ace. 

Yeah, good luck shutting him up now.

"Stop swearing in front of Acey!" Sabo somewhat shouts but managing to keep his voice fairly low as not to hurt his nephew's ears. "H-How was your night, [F/n]?" The blonde then asks somewhat nervously, a drop of sweat rolling down the side of his face. "I hope it went well--"

"YOU GOTTA CRUSH ON HER OR SOMETHING?!" Ace once again blurts out loud, causing Luffy to cackle and Marco to facepalm. Sabo looking deflated as he gently brings your baby's head closer to his chest, as if he's trying to shield his little ears from all the noise. "THATCH, YOU SHOULD PUNCH HIM FOR THAT! THAT'S DISLOYALTY!"

Of course, Thatch doesn't care to. Because he's not stupid and knows damn well that Sabo sounds shaky when speaking to you because he feels guilty for taking Thatch out, it was originally his idea after all. He wanted to take Luffy for his first drink since they didn't do this when the boy turned 18 because he preferred to go paintballing instead. Typical Luffy.

Not that he needs to feel guilty about it though, you wanted Thatch to go yourself after all. 

"How are my two favorite family members~?" The brunette chimes as he makes his way over to you, carefully stroking Acey's cute little face as he passes and naturally once he reaches the couch, he leans over to plant a kiss on your lips.

His lips taste like beer and his beard tickles your chin a little as you return the affections, your heart fluttering happily at his warmth. "HEY, WE'RE HERE TOOOO~!" Ace calls out, struggling to make his way over to the armchair to the side of the TV, thankfully Sabo moves away from him with your son still in his arms. You don't trust drunken Ace around furniture let alone a child. 

"I know what I said." Thatch murmurs against your lips before pulling away and slumping down beside you instead, his body sluggish and his hair not looking any better than it did before he left. "Was little Ace good to you~?" The brunette asks as he eyeballs your small frame, something about him just seems all the more hotter when he's intoxicated.

"He wa--"

"HAA~! LITTLE ACE SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT MY DICK~! HAHA~! WAS LITTLE ACE...good...to you...ew." Ace thinks out loudly as he often does after a drink, immediately silencing you as you try to process exactly what he just said. Hell, he looks simply mortified himself at his own statement.  "uh...H-HEY, LUFFY, WHEN THESE BORING OLD MEN AREN'T AROUND, WE'LL TAKE YOU TO A STRIPCLUB~! WON'T WE, SABO~?!"

Thank you for changing the sub--NO, NOT LUFFY!

"A stripclub? Shishishi sounds fun~!"

NO!

"No, we won't." Sabo deadpans with a frown etched into his features, still sandwiching little Ace's head in between his chest and hand. "Now stop being gross, your baby nephew is here, remember?" 

Thank God for Sabo, Luffy's too innocent for those sort of places and Acey's too innocent for these conversations!

"Yeah, shut your dirty mouth around my son, you perv--"

"[F/n]! We wanted to go to the stripclubtonight but Thatch and Marco were like nooooo," Ace goes on with a dramatic wave of his hand and his onyx eye rolling all over the room, his focus apparently unable to set on you. "I mean, I get Thatch, he's with you and got a baby and too classy for that apparently but MARCO?! WHAT THE FUCK MAN?!"

"Ace, language." Sabo urges quietly whilst shooting a disapproving look at the freckled boy, completely ignoring the little tugs Acey's giving his blonde locks. "Besides, no one wanted to go there. You wouldn't either if you were sober." 

"HOW WOULD YOU KNOW WHAT I LIKE WHEN I'M SOBER?"

"Seriously yoi, shut up. People are tryna sleep in this neighborhood, you big mouth."

"I'M NOT EVEN BEING LOUD, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?"

"Ace." Thatch husks calmly but also holding a somewhat dark aura to him and that's all he really needs, the freckled brother immediately simmering down as he leans back into his armchair, a low groan leaving his lips. 

"Anyway yoi, where's pops?"

"Oh, he said he had some business to deal with at work." You answer the blonde with a polite smile. You hear Thatch grumbling something under his breath but not seeming to be aiming it at you in any way, his dark eyes are glued to his shirt buttons, struggling terribly to unfasten them.

"Stupid small holes...stupid fat buttons...heh, small hole...hurhur...~" 

It's only now that you wonder just how much beer your fiancé has even had tonight.