In total honesty, Leo had no idea how any of this ever happened. Stupid feelings always got in the stupid way and he was supposed to be straight, gods damn it! So why was he getting all of these gay thoughts for Jason? They made him feel uncomfortable.
It's not that he's homophobic by any means. He feels fine around Nico and Will, nothing ever felt weird or odd about them. Well, maybe Nico was weird, but he spooked Leo before the Latino knew he was gay so that doesn't count. No, he was leaning more to the source of awkwardness being that Jason had Piper, his girlfriend. This meant two things; he's taken and straight.
Which is why Leo resorted to hiding out with Festus in Bunker 9, running on RedBull and the sheer force of will because the gods know he definitely hasn't been sleeping.
"...which is why I'm here because then it's like HA, can't catch me gay thoughts!" Leo slurred to Festus through a yawn. The dragon let out a creak in worry, eyes softly glowing as they stared at Leo.
"'M fine. I got some... some RedBull. 'M alone so I can wallow in self pity and realize I'm such a shitty friend to Pipes for having these feelings. Aphrodite has fucked with me for the last time, I tell you! This is not funny. What is Pipes gonna think when she finds out? What is Jase gonna think?!" Leo sighed, leaning his head on his desk.
"He's going to be a little worried you have the hots for his girlfriend." a voice sounded back to him in a joking manner.
Leo's heart started thumping fast as Jason's face came into view, suddenly alert as his brain processed what Jason was saying. Leo? Crushing on Piper? Yeah, no.
"Aha... right... how long have you been, uh, there?" Leo asked, trying to wipe the sleep from his eyes. He forced his eyes to stay open, almost tempted to give in to the exhaustion if only for the sole purpose of avoiding this awkward atmosphere. No such luck.
"Is that why you've been holed up in here?" Jason asked instead. He was looking at Leo with worry and it almost, almost made Leo think he wasn't just imagining it. There is no way Jason would ever actually look at him like that, with so much caring and fondness. His mind was just amplifying it because it's what he wanted. He's tired and Jason's straight, why couldn't his heart understand that?
"Festus needed upgrades." Leo half-shrugged, turning back to said dragon's body to signal the conversation was over. He wanted to be left alone to continue suffering in silence. It'd been working thus far and at least this way he only hurt himself. So why was Jason not leaving?
The blond had still chosen to sit beside him, uncomfortably close because Leo could practically feel the body heat radiating off him in plenty loads, and remained silent as he watched the smaller boy work away at his dragon.
Leo lasted about five minutes of being awkwardly stared at before he caved in, setting his vice grip and wrench down and turning to Jason in exasperation.
"Alright, fine, what else do you want?" Leo asked, unnerved by his gaze.
He didn't like being stared at by his crush. It made his skin crawl because what if Jason somehow picked up on his feelings? He could imagine it now.
'Leo are you gay?' 'Uh, maybe...?' 'Oh... Um, we can't be friends anymore. Bye forever.' And then everyone laughs at him and the world explodes. Okay maybe he was being a little dramatic and unrealistic, because Jase didn't react that way with Nico, but still, feelings trumped rationality.
"I didn't say anything." Jason replied.
"You didn't have to. I can physically feel it and I can't work like that so c'mon. Lay it on me. Why're you still here?" Leo raised an eyebrow, trying to feign confidence.
Jason keeps silent for another moment to gather his thoughts, torturing Leo until he finally opens his mouth.
"I don't want you to avoid us anymore."
"I'm not-"
"Yes, you are! Look, I know you..." no you don't, Leo wants to point out, you only know the version of me Hera wanted you to see and not the real, disappointing me that can't keep himself in check, but he remains silent. "and this isn't normal. You don't have to hide just because you like Piper. I don't mind, I know I can trust the both of you."
Leo keeps his mouth shut, unsure on how to reply. He doesn't like Piper like that. He can't. He's gay. And for some reason, he likes Jason instead. Out of everyone at camp, he fell for the taken one and gods, he was stupid, so stupid. He would never stand a chance because Jason likes Piper and Jason is straight and even if he wasn't he wouldn't dare take his best friend's boyfriend and oh my god he was such a terrible person for liking her boyfriend, what kind of asshole would-
"Leo?" Jason interrupted his train of thought.
"I got it. No more hiding, I promise." Lie.
Leo forced a smile.
Jason eyed him for a little longer before breaking into a smile himself, looking like he'd found what he was searching for. He nodded promptly in affirmation to Leo's words, "Good. Get some rest, okay? And a proper meal. I'll see you at dinner." he said, smiling one last time before walking off.
"Yeah..." Leo awkwardly replied, sitting back down on his chair and giving Festus a glance. A sinking feeling set into his chest again as he picked up the wrench, halfheartedly going back to work.
"Maybe I'll get lucky and actually stay dead next time." he crudely joked to Festus. The dragon let out a disapproving creak, sensing the hint of sincerity in the words. "Only joking..." Leo lied, taking a sip of his sixth RedBull of the morning. He reached for the vice grip once more, and just like that he went back into his vicious cycle of self destruction. The only exception was that this time, he made sure to seal the bunker's door.
