What went wrong

Chapter 5

Right as I open my journal to write I hear the front door open and my parents are both home.

"WERE HOME!" I hear my mom yell as if I live 100 feet away.

I know, I know I'm here as usual...

"Come on cheer up!" My mom says as she walks in my room

" You can't stay like this forever, Jacob wouldn't have wanted that would he!"

" yes, ya I know."

"So let's go shopping!"

"Right?girls your age love shopping"

"Um ya I guess so mom."

" How about we can have a girls night!"

"Okay"

I mean I kinda don't want to go but I go anyway.

I get in the car and start listening to my favorite music, pop, anything really.

When we get there I go in a few stores but I only buy a few new tops and some shorts.

When we get home we eat dinner, we eat late every night it's 8:00 so we just order pizza. Classic. I'm actually pretty glad and when I get my pizza I go straight to my room and start writing right were I left off. A blank page okay better start writing.

Have you ever felt so bad at one time you just wanted to stop. Well I have the worst but I know Jacob wouldn't let me stop so I kept going. Nobody realizes most things hurt all the bullying. Everyone says I killed him and well I didn't. I'm just going to come out and say it. I know many of you after this will tell me,"it's all lies" but I. Don't. Care. Anymore.

Jacob and I have been together almost 2 years, long I know. We didn't care about anybody we were a happy couple, shall you say. We got really close and out family's loved each other we would go everywhere together. I guess until about January. It is indianapolis. So something was up with Jacob I could just tell, he wasn't acting the same. I called him and asked if he wanted to hang out and he said no I'm sick. Last time he was sick he still came over and I took care of him and he took care of me it was so sweet. And now he's "sick" I didn't believe it so I called his mom since we were close and she said," oh no he's just in his room probably playing video games I'm sure he would love to have you over!" That was one of the last times I talked to his mom. She still here but she's just drifted away from me since Jacobs gone. All I can remember was right before I hung up and after I said bye I herd a scream cry hard to explain, but I could tell it was him.

I stopped writing. I just realized I've been crying I don't know if I can finish so I put my journal away and just decide to go to bed. Maybe I can talk to Abby or Landon tomorrow. Since it's only 9:00 I decide to go through my phone I clear everything and get new accounts just to clear my mind. New Instagram, snapchat, vine, twitter,Facebook,Tumblr, everything.

I feel a little bit better, then I look at my phone and my new Instagram dings and it says Landon started following you, wow already that boy had to be a stalker! Anyway I follow him back and go to bed.

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Ok hey guys! Sorry I haven't updating in awhile I will update more when school gets out! :) and I will try to write more.