The Silence Before the Fart

Part Two

January 6, 2017.
Four more months until this disastrous life is over. Four more months until I'm 18, and can get my name changed. At least then my name won't be Mayonnaise Denise.
   Today, I've decided to go to the mall with my best bitches, Larri and Sharen. I've been friends with them since birth. Our mothers met at the hospital and clicked immediately. So did we, once we developed feelings. Without them, I'm trash. With them, I'm still trash, but with friends ya know!
  Then we ran into this trick ass hoe named Wawa (her actual name is Watermelondrea because she's as fat as one) that everyone hates and she wanted to fight. Naturally, Larri was the first one to exchange words with the rat.

  "Hey Watermelondrea, the doctor called with your colonoscopy results, good news! They've found your head!!!"

  "Uhm what?? Hoe I ain't no doctor??"

  "That's shocking! Considering you've got the GPA of a rock!"

"Aye you best take that back my grandmas a rock!"

"I think the fuck not you trick ass hoe!"

"Okay, bet. Dance battle."

"Oh shit this bitch Wawa going D O W N!" Sharen said.

"I think not!" Wawa said, "I dance better than Malu Tevehoe!" (Yea I know it's Trevejo, issa joke)

"... BITCH YOU DANCE LIKE A ROACH AFTER YOU SPRAY IT WITH REPELLANT!" Larri shouted, which made us all witch cackle.

"Y'all mean, I'm out!" Watermelondrea started to cry, the left.

"Thank God that roach left!" I exclaimed, thankfully.

Then we all continued shopping and bought some cute shit and left. Day well spent.

Hey y'all I finally updated! I told you I would! BTW, the reason why it says January 6th in the beginning is because that's when I started this chapter! Anyways, hope you enjoyed. Peace out heaux! (Danielle Broccoli (Bregoli) reference!)