Waiting for the Moment (Rizzoli and Isles)

Chapter 7

Maura is beautiful. Absolutely gorgeous. She's mine. She's my wife, my love. I'm not going to screw this up again.

A year ago, I woke up just like this. Maura's head was rested on my chest, her arm resting over my stomach, her hand in mine. It was perfect.

We argued that day. We yelled and screamed at each other. I said horrible things to her. That argument drove me away. It was stupid. So stupid, in fact, that I can't even remember what the argument was about. Maura would remember. She always remembers.

Jessica Thorne was her name. I met her years ago at my cousins wedding and we crossed paths last year. That night, I slept with her. I never wanted to hurt Maura like that, but it happened.

Maura walked in my apartment later that night. She saw two plates, two forks, two knives, and a bottle of wine. She pushed my bedroom door wide open and gasped when she saw the blonde woman under me. The pain I saw in her eyes broke my heart and knowing that I was the cause of that pain made it worse.

The most horrifying part was that she apologized before she darted to the door. I got up and wrapped a sheet around my body and raced Maura to the door.

"Maura, please wait."

"I'm sorry, Jane. I didn't mean to interrupt your romantic evening with that blonde girl."

"Maura, it's not what it looks like."

"It looks like you were having sex with that woman."

I stared at her.

"Okay, maybe it is what it looks like, but it doesn't mean anything."

"Yes it does, Jane! It means that when things get rough, you run. You run, Jane! Do you know what that tells me? It tells me that our relationship is unimportant to you. I can't do that. I can't be a part of that."

Maura's voice pulled me away from my thoughts.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked me.

"You." I said, looking down at her. "I love you, Maura."

"I love you too, Jane." She said.

I rolled over on top of her and buried my face in her hair.

"I'm so sorry Maura. For everything that's ever happened between us. For what happened last year with Jessica. I'm going to spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you. I'm going to prove to you how much I value you and our relationship."

"Oh, Jane. Honey." Maura said as she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"I know you love me. I know how much you value our relationship. You asked me if I could forget about what happened in the past. I haven't forgotten, but I'm not going to hang it over your head. You are forgiven."