Straight-Faced

plot twist

I hated being nervous.

It wasn't like I never got that twisted feeling that stemmed from my heart to my head to my stomach, but it didn't happen very often. I hardly ever got anxious for auditions and difficult roles, and even when I did, I was great at hiding it. It came with growing up under spotlights.

But right now, I wasn't nervous. I had no reason to be.

Luke had already made his decision, and that was why the air had been slightly tense all evening. I wondered what had solidified it. Maybe it was what I had told him about Tiff. He had been acting distant for the entire date, but especially so after I had finished telling that story. I could see it in his eyes, his smile, and his actions. He didn't want to be more than friends. Or maybe he did, but he thought that wouldn't be the best thing for us. He was the one to realize that this would be really hard while I had been trying to convince the both of us that we could make it work. None of that really mattered, though, because Luke had already made up his mind.

I was driving us back to Luke's house. We were both silent. Tiffany Green was playing on the radio, but neither of us bothered to change the station. I could already vividly picture what was going to happen. I'd pull into his driveway, and we'd get out of my car. Luke would take me up to his room, we'd kick off our shoes, change out of our costumes, and sit on his bed. Then, he'd break out the "I think we should just be friends" line.

If anyone was watching our story, this impending scene would seem like a plot twist. I was calling it now; I saw it coming. Luke had been acting off all night. His flirting was reserved, he didn't ask to hold my hand, and towards the end of the date, he started shying away from eye contact. He was radiating guilt because he was going to reject me.

I wasn't nervous, I wasn't angry, and I wasn't disappointed. I was just waiting for it all to happen. This was how things were designed to be, and I couldn't fight it. I had gotten to kiss him, I had gotten to go on dates with him, and I had gotten to know him. But that was all I was getting. It would be best to accept it now.

Sure enough, everything started playing out exactly as I had envisioned it. I parked my car in Luke's driveway, we climbed out, and I locked it. I followed Luke inside his house, up the stairs, and to his room. As soon as the door was shut, we stripped down to tank tops and boxers.

"Cameron." Luke took a seat on his bed and patted the space next to him.

I was good at reading people, and sometimes, I hated it. I knew what he was about to say. By his small, sad smile, I think Luke knew that I knew.

This wasn't fair. There wasn't much that I wanted in life. I had been spoiled for as long as I could remember. I had all the things that I didn't ask for. But wanting a person was different.

I sat down next to him. I kind of wanted to cry, but I wasn't going to. My composure was stable, like always. Two years of restraint had led up to this.

An image of Tiff appeared in my mind. Shortly after our falling out, I saw her at an awards show. We had made eye contact, and she gave me a hollow smile. And sure, we were on good terms. But I wouldn't ever be able to forget the look on her face.

Luke cleared his throat. I looked up into his eyes, the eyes that made me recognize him out of the tens of thousands of people that I had met after him.

"Cameron," he repeated.

This was it. I was never going to be able to look into those eyes again.

"I think we should just be-"