I miss being happy. I miss laughing. I miss all of it without having to fake it all and make it seem like I'm okay. I'm getting tired and hiding it all, and I feel myself giving up. Not on us, but for standing up for myself. I want you to win, not because you're right, but because I want it to get to an end. I miss the way we used to be, I miss being happy all the time and never getting into arguments or stuck in misunderstandings everyday. I miss communicating and having fun. I miss it all, I want it to be how it was before, happier and less depressing for the both of us. But something happens and it only repeats, even after speaking to one another. But you refuse to see any of this actually happening. You claim it's getting better but we only argue and push things aside. I cry and you leave me for no reason. We're fading and you don't even notice it. And the fact that you can't see it makes me feel like you don't care. But you tell me you do, so I believe it. I just want us to actually be happy like we used to be.
