Beautiful Mayhem

➳ Mayhem Two ➳

▲ BAD OMEN ▼

"You are still my favorite chapter  that I keep on re-reading night after night till my eyes are red with tears and my heart hurts from the memories of your lost  touch."

Cynthia Go

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My eyes are puffy for crying my heart out last night, hair is sticking out in every direction and dark circles under my eyes. Those brown eyes of mine look completely lifeless.

I'm a mess.

He did this to me. I thought that he's the one. I'm already planning out our future but fate slapped my face real hard, waking me up and made me realize that he decided that I'm not going to be a part of his future.

I let out a shaky breath.  I don't want to go to school because of that bastard. I don't even want to see his brown hair, emerald eyes and captivating smile.

But I guess, I have to face my own fears.

I take a bath and dress up. I don't usually apply anything on my face but this is an emergency so I put some concealer. I look at myself in the mirror.

Simple outfit for this day with black shirt, a pair of ripped jeans and sneakers. The only accessory I have is the necklace around my neck. Kent gave it to me on our first date and I couldn't bring myself to throw it away even though he inflicted so much pain on me.

I'm plain and boring, that's why he broke up with me.

I shake my head, trying to forget the horrible words he said to me. I went downstairs specifically towards the kitchen. Charlie is already eating his favorite oatmeal, not even looking up to acknowledge my presence. My parents are off to work.

I don't have an appetite right now so I just grabbed a slice of bread and carton of milk. I sat down across Charlie, ignoring him.

"He broke up with you," Charlie said after a moment of silence.

Way to go of ruining my day, Charlie. Yay!

I didn't bother to say anything to him. Well, how did he find out?

"I found it out because you came home yesterday, crying like a 5-year-old kid," he says, without looking at me. Even though his statement is a little bit harsh, I can hear a hint of concern laced in his voice.

I smiled faintly. He cares for me but he doesn't want to show it.

"Just forget him Xandria. He is not worthy of your love."

I was taken aback by his words but I didn't say anything.

I'ts not that easy. Its not easy to forget the guy who gave you so much to remember. It's hard to forget your first love.

⚫⚫⚫

I parked my car to my usual spot. I turned off the engine, and I have this feeling that I should turn it on again and just go home. I really don't have any strength to be here. 

Just thinking about bumping into him down the hallway makes my gut churn. Kent used to wait me outside and gives me a kiss on the forehead, like it's the natural thing to do as a greeting.

Stop it Alexandria! Stop thinking about him. Just forget him, you stupid girl!

I let out a breath. I have no choice. When I got out from my car, I saw my best friend, Kate, running towards me.