Hey, I know That I said that I would update everyday, that was a lie. Don't ever trust what I say. Anyways, I will try to update at least once a week. Thats kool, I guess. I mean Lets just get started now, This is draging on wayyy longer than I planned.
1. I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day.
2. The future, the Present and the Past walked into a bar. Things got a little tense.
3. Just burned 2,000 calories. Thats the last time I leave brownies in the oven.
4. My girlfriend told me she was leaving becuase I was acting like a trasnformer. I said "Wait, I can change!"
5. Did you hear about the kiddnapping at school? Its okay. he woke up.
6. eBay is so useless. I tried to look up lighters but is only had 13,749 matches.
7. My boss says I intimadate the other employes. So I just stared at him until he apologized.
8. What do you call the security guard that works outside a samsung store? Gaurdian of the Galaxy
9. Teacher: Can anyone name 3 presidents that brought happiness in the world?
Student: Drin-king, Smo-king, and Fu-king. (Please, don't smoke, its not good for your health.)
10. (I'm sorry... I had too.) What do you call a cow with no legs. GROUND BEEF.
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Well, thats all folks!
