Generation Lost

2. Kali

original chapter, unchanged

<Kali>

"Kali!" I heard Veronica yell at me. "Jesus Christ, Kal, have you been listening to me at all these past five minutes?"

"Sorry Roni, I'm just really tired and stressed, I can't concentrate today," I quietly explained. I hadn't slept much the last week and couldn't find the energy to talk much.

"It's ok, I know you're having problems with Tyler again," Veronica replied, pulling me into a hug and gently kissing my cheek. I looked up to see a woman and her two young daughters move from the table next to us to one further away, the woman looking at as with a disgusted look. I sighed; even the good part of town was swarming with homophobes.

"Can you get me a coffee please? I'll pay for your drink too," Roni said, handing me a 10 dollar note. I got up and walked over to the counter, lining up behind a middle aged lady with a bright red fake leather handbag. I really hoped that my mouth had cruise control because I didn't think it would cooperate willingly when it came to ordering our drinks.

I felt my hand twitch familiarly, begging to slip into the handbag, to take the first thing it touched. Wanting the rush of adrenaline that I knew I would get if I just...

The lady payed for her diet coke and reached up to get a straw... I couldn't resist any longer, my hand slipped into the bag, pulling out what felt like a thin piece of fabric and stuffing it into the pocket of my plain black hoodie. I felt the rush of guilt soon after, but when I looked around for the lady, she was nowhere to be seen.

The adrenaline had left my body completely when I ordered and payed for the two coffees a moment later.

I sat back down across from Roni, handing her a coffee. I reached into my pocket to get Veronica's change, a fresh wave of guilt hitting me when I felt the fabric that I now realised was a handkerchief.

I pulled my hand out, wanting to forget what I had just done. I felt Roni take my hand in hers across the table. I couldn't help but think that maybe she would be enough to fix me, but I doubted it.

</Kali>