Parent Points

Bath Day

I was sitting in the corner of our room with my best friend Trevor as we usually do just like any other day, but today was a special day. It was bath day.

“Bath time!” Our teacher, Ms. Erin called out. We all raced to the door, pushing, shoving. One day of the week we took our baths and got all nice and clean, hoping one of the adults here to adopt would choose us. As soon as we got into a messy single file line, we walked down the hall to the showers. We walked past the 200, 300, and 400 rooms. Eventually we walked past the 500 room. I looked inside.

There were new, shiny books, and a clean chalk board for learning. Some kids even had glasses! No one ever had glasses in our group. They cost too much. They had chests of toys and shelves of paint. How I wished to be there.

We walked past the office and looked inside. There was a 400 getting ready to go home with their new parents. They looked so happy. She was hugging her new parents as tight as she could. She looked over her new dad's shoulder and we made eye contact. She looked at me with the happiest most cheerful smile. Although I was extremely envious I couldn't help but smile back because I was happy for her.

We arrived at the bathing room and we all raced to find a shower. There were at least 30. We all got undressed and showered. I washed my hair to make sure it was nice and clean. I scrubbed all the dirt off my arms and feet. I quickly got out and put on my, now clean, reused clothes.

I walked over to the sink and I combed through my wet, ragged hair. I looked in the mirror at my dark skin and hazel eyes. I didn’t understand why I was only a 100. Was I not good enough? What was wrong with me. I mean, is it something with my appearance? I don't know what's different about me than other kids? Is it my dark skin? I've seen a girl with dark skin in a 400 room. Is it my hazel eyes? I've seen kids with hazel eyes? Is it my height? I am quite small but don't see the problem with that. I'll grow won't I?

All this wondering filled me with rage. What was wrong with me? I don't understand. My face turned red as I looked in the mirror again. What was wrong with me? I don't understand! I started to bang my hands against the porcelain sink. I banged harder and harder and people noticed. I heard Trevor tell me to stop but I couldn't. Why was I not special? Why was I the one no one loved!?

Ms. Erin came and grabbed me. She took my hand and we all walked back to our room. When we got to the room she took me to her office. She wanted to talk to me. It was the same talk every time. She asks me what's wrong and I say nothing. She gives me a worry filled look and lets me go. End of conversation.

"Sam.. honey what's wrong?"

"Nothing," I say. She looked at me with he look, but this time it was different. It had a hint of... Anger? Sadness? Confusion? I couldn't tell. I studied her face harder. Then, I realized.. it was the worst expression of them all, Determination. Determination is the most terrifying thing. People can be unstoppable if they're determined. It usually means they weren't giving up, no matter what you say. It was my least favorite word.

"Max... You say that everytime. You can talk to me," She said. Should I trust her?  I looked into her brown eyes. They seemed trusting, but did all of her? Her straight, flat, blonde hair and wrinkly skin. She wasn't that old, she just smoked a lot. She had an alcoholic boyfriend too. I hear her arguing on the phone with her mom at lunch when I sneak into the room to get toys. I wonder if she has kids.

"Sam? Are you okay?" She asked.

"I'm fine," I say.

"No you're not sweetie, you can tell me these things." I realized no matter what I say, she'll never stop asking. She was determined. So, I gave up.

"I-I just... I just don't understand why I'm a 100. Why any of us are 100s. What's wrong with us? Why are we the least loved. Why don't we deserve new toys and a pretty chalk board for learning?" I started to tear up. She got down on one knee to face my height. She pulled me into a hug. I couldn't help but start crying into her shoulder.

"Oh I wish I knew... I wish you were a 500. I wish all of you were 500s too. I don't understand why you're split either. I'm so sorry." I hear her say. Her voice was muffled. After that we just sat there, crying for what felt like hours..