Downtown (Foster the People Fanfic)

Trying to Rethink

We arrived at the apartment. There were shattered bits of glass in the parking lot. I picked up a fragment and threw it. It sliced two of my fingers and they started dripping down blood. Ponsi started towards the car and looked back at me. He sprinted towards me and puffed angrily.

"Seriously Mark?!" He yelled, I yelled back in agony from the cut. It had dirt all over the cut which made my hand hurt worse. I shouted and stomped my foot. Ponsi grabbed my wrist and dragged me in. I yanked my hand backwards and got out of his grasp. We both glared at each other and slowly walked into the elevator.

"You're too angry about this." He groaned out angrily. I looked down at my cut and tried to dust off the dirt. My head whipped around towards him and I chuckled.

"Try imagining me getting shot then. The band would be toast." I held my hand and started wrapping it up in paper towels from the lobby. Ponsi groaned in fury and walked out of the elevator behind me.

"Let's just get that hand cleaned up." The keys were yanked out of my pockets by Ponsi as he was walking beside me.

"Hey?!" I clenched my fist and hurt my hand more. Stupid idea.

"Just trying to open the door for you." Ponsi opened up the door and put up the keys on my counter.

"Thanks." I walked down the hall and got the little unused aid kit out. Ponsi came in and looked around. The fizzy alcohol poured over my dirt smothered hand. Dried blood covered my arm from me.... And Autumn. I gasped and backed up on the wall.

"I CANT DO THIS PONSI." I yelled in the bathroom and the echo reached out into the halls. He grabbed my arms and examined them.

"You can Mark, you're just not well... Prepared enough." He wrapped my arms up in bandages and left the bathroom.

"Not prepared? I wasn't ready first of all." I put my hands on the back of my head and took in deep breaths. The night sky eventually came through the windows as I sat down. Ponsi was walking around the apartment and thinking.

"Why did you love her then?" He added tapping his chin, facing me. All of a sudden I clenched my fists, slightly making me whimper under my breath.

"She needed it." The little voice came out, it sounded shattering. I don't know, it just didn't sound right.

"You mean you needed it?" That statement made me think... I mean was it true? Did I need her love more than she did mine? Psh, I didn't act like I loved her. I needed to show her I love her... But I just don't know how. It just never crossed my mind how I could.

"I don't know Ponsi, right now this whole event has me twisted." A long sigh left my throat as I looked down at my dirty shoes. He came over and patted my shoulder.

"You'll figure it out." He slightly smiled and grabbed his keys he left.

"Well I guess I'll see you later." He looked towards me and slowly walked out. I shook my head and stumbled around the apartment. It gradually started smelling like Autumn when I crept closer to her room. All that was left was her unmade bed and jacket. I grabbed the jacket and walked into the living room. I sat down with it clinging in my hands. The bandages were getting moist from my blood that was still flowing out. It hurt. Not just my hands... But staring at that jacket. I closed my eyes trying not to remember the cameras and reporters. So I drifted off...

--------------*Dream*--------------

Me and Autumn were on our way to the donut shop. We both saw Cubbie and Ponsi outside waiting for us. Coming of Age came on as we stepped out of the car. She stepped out into the parking lot with the radio still on and hopped around.!

"Run with me!" She giggled and grabbed my hands. I was lunged out of the car by her and we were dancing and running around. Ponsi and Cubbie joined us and ran around the parking lot like loons. But it was fun.

Then everything shook.

I didn't fall over nether did the guys. But Autumn was helpless. She seemed so far away, but she was right there I front of me! All I could see was the blood pouring onto the concrete. It hurt seeing her like that... She looked up at me with tears flowing down her cheeks. I tried to lunge forward and touch her but I was like glued to the ground. Flashes appeared out the corner of my eye. People around me were gasping and crying. Then news reporters were surrounding Autumn.

"GET AWAY!" I screamed toward them trying to make them flee. But no one budged. Cops entered the scene and so did doctors. Then the reporters flooded toward me.

"Did you do this?"

"Why didn't you protect her like a real guardian?"

"Do you think she is going to die?"

"Why did you even think about adopting a little girl?!"

The questions were back again, and Autumn was slowly dying. I didn't have a chance to say I loved her again. Or even goodbye.

"AUTUMN!" I yelled trying to see her over the crowd. All I saw was a puddle of blood on the ground, and the ambulance leaving.

"Mark?! What do you have to say about this?"

"Do you think your career will be affected Mark?"

"Mark, will she ever survive this?"

"Will your band mates be affected Mark?"

"Mark... Mark... Mark... Mark" over and over! All I wanted to see was her!

-------------------------------------

"Mark wake up." A voice wakened me, and my shoulders were being shook. I looked up and saw Kayla. What the heck was she doing in my apartment?

"Mark?" She whispered and looked down at me.

"Ugh, uh yea?" I moaned and sat up looking up at her.

"You were yelling Autumns name a while ago. Are you ok?" She backed up and sat on a chair in front of me. I sniffed and rubbed my nose.

"I really don't know." I shrugged and looked down at my shoes. They were still dirty, I thought.

"Where is Autumn anyway?" She smiled and slapped her hands down on her lap. Her eyes were focused deep in mine.

"She's... Not here." I frowned and closed my eyes.

"Well I know that silly." She chuckled and hit me in the shoulder.

"She's in the um... Hospital." I bit my lip and slightly opened my eyes.

"The hospital? Why?!"

"You didn't hear the gunfire earlier?" She shook her head and started tearing up.

"N-no, I was gone at the mall all day." She stuttered out.

"Oh, she's alive. But in pain." The words made me gag and choke. It was pain saying them.

"She'll get better, I'm sure!" It looked like she was trying to cheer me up, but I knew she wouldn't be the same.

"Maybe, hey I'm going to bed..." I lied right through my teeth. I was gonna drink, and I don't even care if I get drunk.

"Ok. Well I'll see you later I guess." She shrugged and waved goodbye. I waved slightly back as she walked out. As I looked into the fridge all there was, was a half bottle of beer. I cursed under my breath. My phone vibrated and I looked down at my pockets and grabbed my phone.

Caller ID: Autumn :)

Text:

Don't get drunk on me ;)

I sat there puzzled and happy at the same time. All I did was throw that bottle out of my sight.