Goodnight ~ The Lonely Room (Frikey)

The First Memory

"Would you like to know what the future holds?" I ask Frank. We are sitting on the hood of the van, the doors opened, Jimi Hendrix filling our ears from the mixtape Ray had made yesterday. A beer bottle was settled in between my thighs and we looked  over the edge of the barren parking lot, lost somewhere in Oklahoma. It's hot and dusty, my lung's pain worsening.

I watched Frank take a drag of his cigarette and seemingly curse at nothing out of the corner of my eye. Frank looked so dirty smoking, but in a peculiar way it was almost artistic. He blew it out, like a fountain blows out water and I giggled a little, Frank winking at me from the side, but maybe he was just blinking.

"Why the fuck would I want to do that?" Frank asked a couple of minutes later. He tapped his ash on the white hood, smearing black on it. "The unknown is what makes life fun."

I shrug, listening to the mixtape closely as I raise the bottle up to my mouth. It was shit beer, but the only kind they could afford. Everyone pitched in, rifiling through in between the seats and the floor of the van. The grand total was a couple of quarters and nickels but it was enough. "I just want this to all be worth it someday, yknow?" I said, licking my bottom lip.

I looked at Frank, curious about the weird look on his face and I watched as Frank took another sip of beer. After two minutes, Frank just shrugs and looks away. "Better than Barnes and Nobles, Mikey."

I smile down at Frank for a few seconds and hid my teeth again. "Yeah, I think so."

Frank cheers Mikey with the pair's bottles. "Fuck the money. We are rock and roll gods, Mikey."

I move my lips to one side of my mouth, not as happy as Frank sounded. "You are, but me? I don't know, Fran-"

"Fuck you, Mikey." Frank said suddenly, laying down on the hood of the van. Gerard's doodled chucks hanging off the front of the car. The doodles themselves, well, would be quite disastrous to explain. Frank hands the cigarette to me, a loud crack of thunder came from the countryside and made me jump, Frank smirking at me weakly.

I shook my head, taking the cig and exhaling a puff of smoke I forgot I had. "Gee is the talented brother. All I am..is...well, I'm just Mikey."

Frank frowned at me, turning to lay on his side. "Shut the fuck up." He roughly spoke as ash fell onto my lap as I just sat there and blinked. Frank didn't want to look anymore and he turned away. The vacancy sign of the hotel buzzed softly and blinked brightly, I noticed. "You're not just Mikey." Frank finally spoke, "So just...you're just not, oki dokie?" He said, trying to lighten the mood.

"Oki dokie, Frankie." I said carefully, not wanting to upset Frank again. Frank just  watched sadly.

Frank didn't move for a long time, and I checked his stomach repeatedly to make sure he was breathing.

And then it started to rain. Fat drips of water hit me and Frank softly, but it soon for quicker and heavier, soon soaking us. I slid off the car quickly, turning my head to look up at the rain, letting it run down my face and drip onto my lenses. And then I start to giggle. 

"Hell, yeah!" I exclaimed, moving my arms to open themselves wide, my t-shirt sticking to my chest. I turned to grin at Frank and at that moment I knew that...Frank knew.

I was so fucking lost.