Son of Jashin (Naruto/Percy Jackson)

Chapter 5: Jashin Is An Ass

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The procession of campers, Hunters, Dionysus, and the two Shinto half-bloods were making their way towards the Big House. The Wine God was casually sipping his Coke, oblivious to the lost-in-thought demigods and such behind him...except for Percy and Clair. The son of Jashin was looking rather miserable, and he kept messaging his abdomen as if he was trying to loosen the muscles. Clair's eyes were darting around, looking for a private place to change her wet diaper. Gods above, she hated her mortal and divine mothers for making her wear these damn things!

Amaterasu pops in, 'hey, what eye design do you like the most? Oh, Sasuke's? Well, here you go!' Really, Mom? Eyes? Why not...heal my body? Reconnect my severed nerves? Treat me like I'm actually your daughter!? Or, at the very least, perform the basest of all motherly acts, and give me a damn hug!

"Hey, is that a bathroom?" Clair asked when she spotted a building with the typical signs for male and female next to a door.

"Yes," Dionysus said shortly. Clair wasted no time in heading straight for the bathroom. She had all the things she needed for cleaning herself up sealed in a storage tattoo on her forearm. She didn't count how many times she had done this, nor did she really care, all she was worried about was getting this cold and clammy thing away from her crotch. Luckily, everyone else was too engrossed with one thing or another to ask what Clair was doing.

The daughter of Amaterasu idly wondered what their reactions would be if she came clean and said, 'going to change my diaper.'

Meh. An experiment to be conducted on a later date.

Percy, however, wanted to carve out his intestines because they hurt so much. He knew what was happening to him, and it really irked him. Dad was simply punishing him for fighting Clair, and not sacrificing her soul in his (Jashin's) name. And also for not killing at least one of the Hunters. This was the eighth time Percy had been subject to the effects of the 'menstrual cycle,' whatever the hell that was. Some kind of chemical or drug used to torture and interrogate POWs? Well, whatever it was, Percy hated it with the passion of Christ.

"Are you okay?" Bianca asked from behind.

"No," Percy drew out. "Dad's being a dick again."

"The...menstrual cycle thing again?"

"Yeah..."

Bianca, and the Hunters that had heard, all collectively winced in sympathy for the son of Jashin. Their periods were bad enough, and only made worse due to their divine lineage, since their powers were influenced by their emotions, and the cramps they went through were worse than a mortals'. There was also the age-old argument between boys and girls that periods weren't even that bad; if you could explain female puberty in a way that Percy could understand, he would advocate for the girls.

In the back, two Huntresses were having a quiet conversation between themselves.

"Do you think he's really feeling pain, or is he just faking it?"

"I think he's really feeling it. I mean, he described the symptoms of our periods extremely well, and just look at him. Is that not how we look during our own cycle?"

"True...you don't think he bleeds too, do you?"

"Don't know, but if he did, I think he'd be highly opposed to a tampon, or even a pad."

The Huntresses fell silent, before the first one spoke up again. "do you think Lady Artemis would be upset if we gave him some of our medicine?"

The second one considered it. The medicine in question was a creation of Apollo upon request of Artemis, millennia ago. When a girl joined the Hunt, their body was forever frozen at the age of commitment, so a four-year-old would forever be four, a ten-year-old forever ten, and a teenager forever a teenager. Unfortunately, being stuck as a teenage girl for all eternity came with the sweet perk of forever being stuck in puberty...at least until your body ran out of eggs to cycle through. So, in response to the unwitting torment Artemis put her daughters through, she asked Apollo to make some sort of remedy to help the teens cope with their periods.