I walk by the smiling crowds, laughing and joking like nothing's even happening.
I guess I really am invisible, somehow that stings worse than I expected, but I always knew this was the way it was.
I'm not special. I already know that I didn't need to be told that even though I was told constantly.
All those silly little compliments people say, well I can see straight through them. They typically mean the opposite of what they say and for some messed up reason I'm more okay with that then I am accepting a real compliment.
But all these people still go on though, as though they didn't make me want to end it. I can't blame them though, it's not like I am anything to look at, unless they wanna laugh. Maybe one day I'll escape the whispers but for now I'll just keep watching them laughing and smiling and joking around with each other, wondering if maybe they feel any form of guilt for ruining me and making me hide. For now I'll just wonder if they know that they are the reason that I cry at night or that I have scars that weren't accidental.
For now I'll just wonder how they do it.
