Living with Styles

twenty-three

*Harry's POV*

I'm such a douchebag. And an idiot. Hell, I'm just a horrible person in general.

I should've of never fled. But I did. And now look what happened.

My own mother died, and I didn't even know 'till a week later because my sister, whom I barely knew or remembered, needed a guardian. Now, I'm back here in California, making a 15 year old girl's life even more miserable than it was before.

All she had was mom. That's all she had. She didn't have a dad, or a brother. She barely had grandparents. They're too old to even lift a finger by themselves. All she had was a depressed mother.

And that makes me upset.

That makes me upset because it's my fault Bella has nothing.

It was all my fault. Because I left.

"Harry?" I hear a muffled voice say behind the bedroom door as I walk past.

"What?" I snap.

"Can you come in here?" Bella sniffs.

I walk in and slump down on the chair in the corner of her room. She scoots up to the edge of the bed so now we're only a couple feet apart.

"Harry." She repeats.

"What, Isabella?" I huff.

"Why did you leave?"

I can't believe she actually asked. I wanted to tell her, to explain things earlier, but I knew she wouldn't listen. Now that she's going to, I don't think I can do it.

I sigh and lean forward in my seat. My right hand resting on one leg and my left forearm leaning on the other.

"I left because I was scared." I sound like a total wimp. But it's true.

She looks a little confused.

"I've been scared my whole life." Bella finally says and looks down.

"Of what?"

"Of everything." She admits. "Of mom leaving or dying. Of you ever coming back. Of everything." She looks back up at me. "What were you scared of?"

"A lot of things." I lean back in my chair. "Dad had just died and my crazy 9 year old mind was afraid I would 'catch' his cancer. I was also afraid of mom and the way she suddenly started drinking. I don't know if you remember this, but those Saturday nights she went to work and left you and I at home? She went to the diner to try and scramble up money. She would buss tables and waitress all the free time she had. We had nothing left. I was scared we'd end up on the streets. I knew she loved us. She loved us with every inch of her being. But I was scared, Bella. I was so scared. So, I got the bright idea to steal money from mom after she got her paycheck and buy a bus ticket." I let out a small chuckle among the tears I've started to cry. I'm such a sap, sometimes. "I remember, I was planning on taking you with me, Bella. But I had decided against it so mom would have some company."

She lays back on her pillow. "So, that's it?" She sighs. "You left because you're just a big-ass wimp."

I huff at the use of her words. They kind of ruined the moment of my confession, but "Yeah, basically."

I thought for sure she would understand. Why doesn't she?

She sits back up and looks me in the eye, her emerald green eyes that match mine look darker than usual.

"Wow, Harold."

~

So, yeah. Harry left because he's just a wimp and couldn't handle his own problems. Not the best reason to move halfway across the world lol.

Hope you enjoyed this chapter :)

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-Anna xo