Breathe: Sequal to My Heart

Feeling Pressure

Hayley's POV

I was positioned in Taylor's lap with tears steaming down my face. Jeremy and Taylor made sure everything was ok, and we even talked more about Josh. Taylor didn't move though. We just sat in the floor with our hands intertwined. My hand was painful from the jagged cut of the glass. I shouldn't have done that..

I looked at Taylor with watery eyes and shrugged, "Josh could be let out."

I felt more tears begin to run down my face at the harsh reality in front of me. I still had to tell Taylor about what I found out this morning.

Jeremy gave me a kiss on top of my head and hugged Taylor to leave to go see Kat and Bliss. I didn't exactly want him to go, but I didn't want Jeremy to be caught up in this whole situation.

Taylor eventually picked me up and placed me on the couch in the living room. I turned to face the backside of the couch. I didn't even look at Taylor. There was so much pressure and tension on me already from this morning..

Taylor sat next to me and kept rubbing my thigh, "Hayley are you ok?" He asked in a soothing voice.

I sat there for a second, and I spoke in a weak voice. "No."

"What's wrong, Hayley?" I loved Taylor's voice.. It seemed to flush out all of my problems.

"Everything, Taylor." I sighed. I sat up next to him and leaned up against his side. I placed my hand on my stomach and my head was on Taylor's shoulder. "There's just so much about this morning."

"Listen Hayley, I'm pretty sure that Josh will be found guilty."

I sighed.

"I mean what he did is well known by now.."

I looked up at Taylor with watery eyes. I had to tell him.

"Taylor I-"

"Hayley I mean he did some awful things! He committed first degree murder.." His voice softened.

"Taylor I need-"

"I mean yes he's caused so much but they can't let him out it's not-"

"Taylor I need to tell you something." I spoke up loudly, and Taylor looked at me and took a deep breath.

I sat cross-legged and faced Taylor. "This is important, and the fact that Josh possibly being let out adds to the stress level."

Taylor's deep, never ending eyes softened as he rubbed my back. I knew that he saw me hurting, and everything just seemed to get worse for me emotionally.

I took a deep breath and looked down at the floor, "Was there protection?"

Taylor created a quizzical expression, and I continued to talk.

"Last night when things got.. Intense I guess, did we use protection?"

Taylor's mouth created an "o" shape and closed it again. "No, I don't believe so.. What are you saying, Hayley?"

I took a deep breath and I felt my voice wimped as I spoke. "There were left over tests from that one night on tour, and so I took one just to make sure and.." I looked at Taylor and felt tears slip from my eyes.

He bent over to give me a hug as the reality slowly crushed upon us.

"Catie-" my voice cracked as I locked onto Taylor. The memories of the night with Josh came flooding back to me. The pain of Josh forcing the abortion and seeing the body of Zac Farro fall to the floor. The pain of seeing Taylor that night. The pain of not only seeing Catie and Zac leave, but the pain of seeing myself getting lost. Also the pain of losing a baby was just too much to bare. It was an actual human being. Somebody who could live a life. Taylor and I were going to watch over it.. But no Josh stripped it away from us. The constant thoughts of this kept clawing at me everyday. I couldn't stop thinking about it.

"Taylor I'm-" I struggled to get the words out. "I'm-"

He held me tighter and rubbed my back. He started to shush me as I began to let the tears fall onto his shirt. "You don't need to tell me.. I understand.." Taylor's voice seemed weak as well. "At least I am the father this time right?" Taylor joked softly.

We sat there with sad laughs as we cried in each other's arms.

"Taylor I'm not ready yet.. First Josh and now this.."

Taylor kissed my nose and we locked eye contact, "We will get through this I promise. I promised to follow you into the dark and I'm not done yet."

We just sat there for a while.

Hugging each other as the reality began to sink into our lives.

Yay conclusion jumping short chapters uGH

This isn't exactly good I'm sorry

Anyways uhh at least I updated?

Ok I'll try to update tomorrow yay

~Winter