Sinking Ships

Chapter Ten

Kelsey and I barely speak at all for the rest of the day. I mean, we’ve said a few select words to each other, like if I ask her if she’s hungry, or she asks where something is, but other than that, things are as awkward as hell

I’ve come up with so many different scenarios of how things would turn out when she showed up, but none of them happened. Instead of fighting, hugging or even speaking, we constantly avoid each other, trying not to remember the past.

“Where do you want me to sleep?” Kelsey asks, walking into the living room where I sit. She’s avoiding my eyes as she looks anywhere but at me, trying to make things less awkward.

“You can have my bed, I guess,” I mumble, rubbing my eyes. I had put Tyson to sleep hours ago and hadn’t gone to bed yet, not wanting to bring up our sleeping arrangements.

“Where are you going to sleep?”

“I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“Fallon,” Kelsey whines, taking a step towards me. “Don’t be stupid. You’re sleeping with me. I can’t expect you to-“

I cut her off as I rise to my feet, glaring at her. “Why the fuck would I ever sleep in the same bed with you?”

She stares at me, shocked for the second time today. Quickly, my anger dies down and I rub my face, shaking my head at the floor. I didn’t mean to freak out at her, but lately my bottled up anger has been getting the best of me.

“Sorry,” I mumble, dropping my arms limply to my sides. “It’s late and I don’t know how I’m supposed to act right now.”

“It’s fine,” she says, folding her arms across her chest. Now, seeing it from the other side, I can see why Eve got so angry with me for pretending that everything is okay. “I guess I’ll go to bed?” She gestures to the hall behind her with her thumb, staring at me with raised eyebrows.

“Yeah,” I respond, running my fingers through my hair. Kelsey nods before heading down the hall, leaving me to myself in the silent living room. I lie down on the couch and flick off the lamp. Staring up at the dark ceiling, I listen to Kelsey moving around in my room, probably changing or unpacking her things.

Even long after she settles down, I still can’t close my eyes. Too many thoughts are running through my mind, confusing me as to what I’m supposed to feel. I’m torn. Half of me wants to accept Kelsey with open arms and have things go back to normal, excluding the drugs. But the other half can’t forget and I don’t think it ever will.

I don’t know how long I’ve been asleep when I wake up to Tyson crying. With a sigh, I sit up, rubbing away the sleep from my eyes. I’m halfway down the hall when I notice that it’s quiet again, except for the quiet murmuring coming from Tyson’s room.

“There’s no reason to get upset,” Kelsey coos, rocking Tyson back and forth in her arms. Her back’s to me as she stares down at him. “Mommy’s here.”

“Kelsey,” I mumble, leaning against the doorframe. “What are you doing?”

Kelsey turns to me with wide eyes, startled by me. Tyson on the other hand, is grinning like crazy, even though he’s half-awake in her arms. I feel my heart thrum inside my chest, remembering a similar sight like this when Kelsey stuck around right after the birth.

“Sorry,” she whispers, avoiding my eyes in the dark. “I thought you could use your sleep.”

“I told you that I didn’t think this was a good idea,” I respond, taking a step towards her. Tyson’s eyes start to close as he smiles, falling asleep in her arms.