You Take My Breath Away

December

It was December. Fucking finally !! It's been a tough year for me. I've always loved December. It's my favourite month !! Why you might be asking ?? Because it's Christmas month !! Who doesn't love Christmas ?? It's the best day of the year in my opinion. I believe it's Roger's favourite holiday too. There's a similarly right there.

So, I haven't gotten any calls from Roger all day today. Even if I tried calling him, he would not answer. It worried me. But, I also thought, maybe he was in a pissy mood. As he always gets in. I'll be honest, I get in a pissy mood a lot too. So, I understand. I didn't really want to call him or leave a voice mail after thinking about that. Because, I thought, maybe he'll get mad at me. So, I ignored it, and went to bed depressed for the night.

The next day, I got back to my apartment to get a little rest after visiting my parents. After all, it was only 11AM. I decided to get a little rest and try to call Roger and see if he'll pick up after I rest. I woke up around 1PM, and had about 15 new messages. And they're all from Roger. He must've been worried about me if I got 15 new messages. I listened to all of them, and the last one I heard, made me emotional the most:

"Hey, Ashlee. I just want to let you know, that my mother's in the hospital because she was in a car accident. So, I've left the town for the weekend to visit her. I'll be back at my flat on Monday. I was gonna tell you yesterday, but, a lot of shit was on my mind at the time because of the accident. I'm sorry if this makes you upset. I don't want you upset. Don't feel so lonely without me. You are always welcome to call me if you ever feel lonely. I'm only a call away. So, please don't be upset. It's only for the weekend. Again, I'll be back Monday. When I come back, we can do whatever you want to do. Just know that I got a surprise for you. But, you'll get it on Christmas day. Anyway, I gotta go. Remember, call me if you ever feel lonely. I love you, Ashlee."

And then the beep came as it ended. I'll be honest, I started crying my eyes out as I heard that message. All this time, I thought he was in a pissy mood and didn't want to answer any calls or listen to any voice mails. Ugh, I already felt lonely. So, I gave Roger a call. He didn't answer. I got pissed off when he wasn't answering. Then, I calmed myself down saying, not everyone picks up the phone the first time. I'll just try again. I call him, and he still doesn't answer. This is when I started freaking out now. I decided to give him a voice mail instead:

"Hey, Roger. Why aren't you answering my calls ?? You're worrying me like you did two days ago !! Whenever you get this message, please call me right away. I'm already feeling lonely without you here. Love you, Roger."

And then I hung up the phone. I couldn't stop thinking of Roger. I wanted him here right next to me, snuggling with me on the couch. I wanted him so badly. God, I even started crying again. There was a knock at my door. So, I answered it. It turned out to be my next door neighbor. She asked me if everything was okay, and I told her that I miss Roger. Then she told me that everything will be okay. We said goodbye to each other, and I went to my bed to try to sleep. After crying a lot, it sure has made me fucking tired !! I fell asleep with ease.

Then, I heard the phone ringing. It was about 12 at night. I really didn't feel like answering it. I was really tired. I looked at it to see who's calling me. It said 'unknown number'. So, I ignored it and fell back to sleep. Then, another call came not even 20 minutes later. I looked to see who it was again. Again, it said 'unknown number'. I picked it up and told whoever it was to stop calling my number or I'll call the police. Then, I heard a familiar voice on the phone. It was Roger. He told me he didn't have time to chat. But, he wanted to say one thing:

"Ashlee, I just wanted to check up on how you're doing. I found out that you tried calling me earlier. And you even left me a voice mail. I'm sorry I didn't pick up. I was in the middle of helping my mum around her house. But, I promise tomorrow, I'll make sure I answer you if you're calling me. I love you."

And he hung up. I hope he's not lying to me. A lot of guys have done this to me in the past before. I just hope Roger's not that type of guy. Well, at least I can sleep with relieved, knowing that Roger is fine. I just can't wait till fucking Monday to roll in. I swear, I will be all over him. I hope he'll be ready for it to happen.