The Unexpected Romantic

Chapter 11: Of Desire and Regrets

BEAM

I must be a fool.

How soon can I escape reality? How fast can I forget this stupidity?

What was I even thinking? And Forth? Good choice for a one-night stand, but poor preference for a one-time fuck. And why is that so? He's a friend. That means our paths will have to cross again, and how am I supposed to face him now?

Dim-witted Beam.

Clearly, alcohol prohibits the brain from being lucid while it intensifies whatever emotions you bury deep inside you. I have been around a lot of ladies lately, and all I did was sleep around. These are not just the average type of girls. I've been with really hot ones that no guy can let pass without turning their heads. I know what sex feels like. I am aware how satisfying it should be.

I just have one question right now?

Why did it feel so damn better when I did it with Forth?

Without a doubt, I've lost my mind.

It felt different. A lot different.

His warm breath that reeked of alcohol. Those eyes that pierced through mine. His gentle touch that quickly turned rough. And his soft lips that traced their way to every single shred of my sanity.

I must be insane to be even thinking about it again and again.

It started as a joke. A dare. My head was almost exploding with all kinds of random thoughts about Kit and how I thought I was really attracted to him until I started questioning myself why I wasn't satisfied with the hook-up I just had with a girl.

Everything was fuzzy except for the presence of the engineering moon beside me. He got my back. I had too much to drink even before he arrived, so when he did, all he could do was stay beside me and take care of drunk me. My words incoherent, I may have said the same thing over and over again. About Kit.

"Do you think I like him?" I asked Forth.

"Like who?"

"Ai'Kit. Do you think I like Kit?"

"Probably." he replied.

"Forth, you can take your friend to my room upstairs." I think I heard Lam said.

I didn't know how drunk I looked that time that his friend got to the point where he had to offer his room for me to sleep in. Am I being too much of a trouble now? I guess so when I felt that half of my entire weight has already been shifted to Forth's lap and shoulder, even my head is hovering closely to his lower body.

I must be completely drunk.

Forth got up slowly while pulling my arm and eventually positioning it around his shoulder to make sure I didn't fall. We took the stairs to his friend's room, and the only thing in my mind was for him to not leave me alone.

I didn't know what his presence had caused me, but I felt secure while he was holding me.

He tucked me in, and when I felt that he was planning to go back to his friends, I didn't know what I was thinking, but I just pulled his arm so hard that he couldn't let go.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"I'm going back downstairs to drink."

"Stay with me."

He thought for a second before agreeing to stick around.

He sat on the bed leaning on the headboard next to me thinking maybe of leaving when I fall asleep, but I'm not letting his arm go. He asked for me to loosen up and gave his word that he would stay beside me, but something in my head wasn't satisfied enough with him just being next to me.