Right There || Dylan O'Brien

chapter thirty-four; the apology

Clara had been in bed for a while now. A book was lying in her hands, but she couldn't concentrate on it. All she could was stare at the ceiling, hum a song and wait until Dylan would come back home. It was all because the last thing he said to her; he was sorry, he promised he would make it up to her. But why?

Sure, she figured something had happened when he was at Walmart, he had talked to Jesse. It was expected. But what did he blurt out that make him feel so guilty?

And now he was gone, out with Tyler and who knows what he was doing at this very moment. He could be drinking and be talking to his friend but he also could be dancing with some pretty girl or worse, be kissing her. It was worrying her. But then again, why?

Dylan wasn't like that. She knew him better than that; he was so kind, so caring and she could trust him. He was so good at making her happy, knew the right words to say when she was feeling like this, so unsure about everything.

But he was also very naïve and shy, awkward. What would he be able to do in a situation like that, a girl dancing with him who had other intentions than him, who eventually would kiss him and now that he had alcohol in his system, he would kiss her back-... Stop, stop. It was fine. Everything was fine.

Clara put down her book, turning off the lamp that was on the nightstand and closed her eyes. She sighed.

 ----

She woke up by the front door closing, a few noises and then footsteps entering the bedroom, walking past her. It was Dylan, making himself ready for bed and to go to sleep. She figured by the way he brushed his teeth; he started slow and careful, but ended up quick and harsh. It was a kind of funny how he tried not to wake her up but eventually did anyway because she was such a light sleeper.

A few footsteps walked out of the bathroom, yet not enough to leave the bedroom. She bet it was him grabbing a shirt, but before she could open her eyes to know for sure fingertips touched her cheek and she jumped.

"Oh, you were awake. I'm sorry."

Usually he wouldn't chuckle by something so stupid, but now he did and he couldn't help it. He was fairly drunk, slurring as he spoke and eyes a kind of blank, teary perhaps. She didn't know what to do, what to say because she had never talked to someone who was although she was glad he was back. He was safe, back home and he could just go sleep if he hadn't decided to wake up and talk.

"I'm really sorry. I didn't know you were awake. That's not the only thing why I'm sorry, I'm sorry for everything. For letting you stay at my apartment alone while I'm out, I should've taken you with me. No, I should've stayed here-..."

"Dylan, just go to sleep. I'm fine."

"No, no. I'm not done. You should know I'm sorry for everything that has happened. When I went to Walmart, I saw him. I could've left, I could've gone to Target instead but I-I didn't. He asked me if I was the guy-..."

"The guy?"

"Yeah, the guy. Meaning I'm with you, I'm the other guy," he replied, running a hand through his already messy hair. "He then asked me if I have spoken to you lately. I said yes. He-he asked me how you were doing-..."

"I don't have to know every detail, Dylan. It's okay-..."

"No, no, wait. I left after that. I said you were fine, but that I had to leave because you were at my parents. I could've lied, couldn't I? I was so stupid, so, so-..." he stopped, noticing the smile growing on her face. That confused him. "What, you're not mad at me?"

"No, of course not," she caressed his cheek, shaking her head as she sighed. "You could've said or done much worse. Something that would've caused him to flip and-..."

"I'm not afraid of him."

"Then please think of me, okay? I don't want you to come back from getting groceries from Walmart one day with your whole face all beaten up by him."

All he did was nod.

"Have you had fun?" she asked as he let himself sit down on the side of the bed, watching him look at the ground and shrug. An answered wasn't needed, but she wanted to know what he had done, if it helped to keep his mind of his things.

"Yeah, it was alright."

She leaned her head against his shoulder blades with a sigh. "You went out with your best friend and all you can say is 'yeah, it was alright'. Don't tell me you had been feeling guilty and had been worrying the whole time-..."

"No, eventually I just forgot about it until we went back outside, to go home, and it was quiet. But you know, before that everything was fun. We met up with some people at the bar, then we went clubbing. Not the usual, but it was cool."

"What do you do at a club?" she giggled at her stupid question, but she was confused. People in her class had been talking about going to clubs in the weekend and she had no idea what that included, and then there were the movies she had watched. "You drink, you dance, you hang out. Is that really all?"

"Yeah, it actually is. Most of people are also dry humping people on the sides, or they're making out in the middle of the dance floor. But yeah, you're right," he sniggered, rubbing his hands in his face and yawned. "All I do is dance and drink, though."

"You like dancing?"

"Yeah, I enjoy that a lot. I've asked Holland and Crystal to follow dance classes with me for a several times, but actually it never came to it," he changed position so he could look at her, tugging a strand of hair behind a hair. "Maybe if there's time, it would be fun to go together. If you'd like."

"I'm bad at dancing."

"Have you ever danced?"

"Not professionally."

"Well, then you can't say something like that," he kissed her forehead and stood up to grab a shirt and sweatpants. Then he was about to walk away towards the living room, but he stopped when he noticed her still sitting up in the bed.

"You alright?"

She quickly nodded and lied down on her stomach, causing a slight smile to appear on Dylan's face as he turned around. "I'm letting the door open-..."

Again, he was stopped by her when a took a few steps forward, already taking off his shirt . But this time she called his name, softly but loud enough for him to hear. Whatever was going through her head, he believed it hadn't had anything to do with the fact that she still had to get used to sleeping here. She didn't sound stressed, didn't look worried. There was just something.

"Dylan?"

"Yeah, beautiful?"

Clara went silent for a moment and then sighed. "Goodnight."

"Sweet dreams."