still

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i still remember your hard over eggs in the kitchen

breakfast in the evening always seemed like a mission

i still remember the bland taste of your empty crepes

but i ate them because they were what you had made.


i still remember the night we stayed up late

till four am, oh i wish i could've stayed

i wish i could go back, and just hit pause

knowing that in a second, all of it would be gone.


i still cry at the thought of you

cause i don't understand 

you never told me 

you never gave a reason


i still hope that one day

you'd just stroll through my door

and say, "i'm sorry, i missed you" 

and though you hate hugs

you'd embrace me and ask about the song i sung

that day on that stage, while he watched

and say that he told you how i broke down 

when we made eye contact amongst the crowd

and how i ran out in tears cause i was lost in my thoughts

wondering when the day i don't think of you will come 

cause i'm just so fucking tired of trying to be numb. 

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