Robbie Forgotten

14

This was shaping up to be a fool's errand.

When Robbie had told Sportacus that he wouldn't like anything down in the lair, he'd been partly saying it out of spite, a venting of his frustrations more than an earnest statement. It turned out the other part was unfortunately the truth.

He'd already learned the hard way that Sportacus wasn't all that interested in disguises. At least, not when they were disguises of him. But Robbie wasn't going to risk going down that avenue again. The costumes all lined up inside the big glass tubes were out of the question.

The TV set? Sportacus only ever showed interest in playing sports, running around, and exercising. Robbie didn't think the elf could sit still long enough to get through one infomercial. And judging from the minimalist aesthetic of the airship, he didn't do much shopping anyway.

What about the catapult or the cannon? They might be good for something. But even if Sportacus had any interest in them, Robbie had no idea how to get either one of them above ground. Come to think of it, he had no idea how they'd gotten below ground. Well, never mind. It was a moot point.

All the junk, the broken bits and bobs of machinery, the heavy duty power tools and hammers and building equipment, none of that seemed right either. What about this music box? No, Sportacus didn't seem like the type to be entertained by a plastic ballerina. Those boots that jumped by themselves? Why bother, when Sportacus jumped plenty enough on his own. The cake machine? That was what started this whole mess...

Robbie went back and forth all over the lair looking for anything that could possibly be suited to both of them. For as long as he searched he wasn't able to turn up anything. Everything in the place seemed designed to help a lazy person be even lazier, or had some other more nefarious purpose that Robbie couldn't begin to surmise and frankly didn't want to.

Then he found it.

"The Candy Faker Maker 3000?"

It was a strange blue contraption almost shaped like a jackhammer but with a large funnel on the top, gauges, and a turning crank. Tied to the crank with a bit of string was a small card with cramped handwriting scrawled on it providing some simple instructions. Robbie had to hold the card close to his face to read it.

"Turns candy into healthy stuff in one second..." Hadn't Sportacus suggested that Robbie find a machine that could make something healthy? It was almost too good to be true. He determined to test it out and see for himself.

"Candy in," he directed himself, drawing from a box of old-looking but probably still serviceable taffies. He carefully placed each piece of candy into the open chute. "One, two..." He paused, considering the armful of candy he held, shrugged, and shoved it all in. "Oh, why not." With a chuckle he pounded his fist into the confections to get them into the machine.

With a grunt he hefted the machine upright and braced it against his chest as he turned the crank. It only took a few turns before the device buzzed at him to alert him it was ready to be set back down. Eagerly Robbie flipped open the hatch on the bottom to inspect the results.

It produced a generously plump, deliciously shiny apple. Robbie gasped in admiration of his creation as he took it out and turned it over reverently in his hands. That flawless round shape, that appetizing red skin. It was the epitome of apples everywhere. It was...

"Perfect!"

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Even though Robbie was expecting it and waiting for it, the sound of knocking on the silo door made him spring out of his recliner as though he'd been stuck with a pin. It sounded like thunder rumbling down the chute all the way into the lair. His heartbeat which had quickened at the noise only sped up more as he scrambled to answer the call.