This is my first story on here. Let me know what y'all think.
Warning: Don't steal my work. It will not end well for you. Trust me
Mature Content Warning: If you can't hang with that, then don't read it.
Regina needs a break, a vacation, to get som...
"Awright kyran ye keekin guid th'day." (Hey Kyran you looking good today.)
A tall leggy blonde interrupted Kyran mid-sentence with me.
"Excuse you Bethany you're being rude to Ms Regina here." Kyran kindly reprimanded this "Bethany" character.
"A'm sorry bairn." (I'm sorry baby) said Bethany flashing a fake ass pout. Then she looks over to Nova who was downing the rest of my fries. "Wow Nova pie-eater muckle." (Wow Nova fatty much) she said with a cocky smirk.
Everyone with in ear shot just had this look of extreme shock on their faces. Nova looked at Bethany and said "A'm up th' duff ye boot." (I'm pregnant you bitch).
Bethany, still with a condescending smirk says "That's na reason tae git pie-eater." (That's no reason to get fat.)
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(Not prejudice against skinny chicks. This is a fictional story.)
I couldn't take it anymore. I just had to say something. "Keek 'ere a dinnae ken ye bit honestly ye dae seem lik' a boot." (Look I don't know you but you do seem like a bitch.)
That ruffled her feathers a bit because she came at me with this. "Excuse me na yin wis haen clishmaclaiver wi ye. Bit Nova this is th' perfect example o' pie-eater. Howfur mony burgers hae ye hud th'day huh?" (Excuse me no one was talking to you. But Nova this is the perfect example of fat. How many burgers have you had today huh?)
This bitch "Keek ah kin be pie-eater bit in mah book tis cried curvaceously succulent. Secondly bein' up th' duff is th' perfect reason tae sloch a maiter o yi'll waant 'n' git pie-eater, fur ye'r grawin anither human bein'. (Look I may be fat but in my book it's called curvaceously succulent. Secondly being pregnant is the perfect reason to eat as much as you want and get fat, because you're growing another human being.)
"PREACH!!!!" Desmond and Nova both said in unison before I continued.
"'N' thirdly ah kin be curvy bit ah ken someone that likes it." (And thirdly I may be curvy but I know someone that likes it.) I smile and winked at Kyran. As a sexy grin spread across his face Bethany says.
"Kyran loues me. Isnae that richt bairn?" (Kyran loves me. Isn't that right baby?)
"No"
"Bit ye said ye loved me." (But you said you loved me)
"Ah didnae" (I did not)
"Aye ye did. 'twas while us huvin throwing a sausage up a close lik' twa nights ago." (Yes you did. It was during us having sex like two nights ago.)
Nova chimes in with "See told you"
"Na ah ne'er shagged wi' ye bethany. We gaed oot fur coffee wance 'n' hee haw happened. Ah think ye hae me doilt wi' someone else." (No I never had sex with you Bethany. We went out for coffee once and nothing happened. I think you have me confused with someone else.)
"Yea me" a young man stood up at a near by table. Obviously having heard the entire conversation. Him and five other guys that were sitting at his table. He continued with "Mind me bethany we shagged twa nights ago 'n' ye tellt me tae say that a loue ye fur 'twas th' ainlie wey fur ye tae spunk. Even tellt me that ah didnae hae tae mean it juist say it." (Remember me Bethany we had sex two nights ago and you told me to say that I love you because it was the only way for you to cum. Even told me that I didn't have to mean it just say it.) After the young man said all he had to say, the rest of the guys at his table joined in with a chorus of words that sounded like "yea you told me the same thing."
Bethany puts her hand to her chin like she's thinking and softly says "Och aye. (Oh yea)"
This next statement just came flying out of my mouth. "Sae nae ainlie urr ye a boot bit ye'r a thot tae." (So not only are you a bitch but you're a thot too)
"Whitevur" (Whatever) yelled Bethany as she stormed out of the pub.
After she left it was quiet for about five seconds before everyone started cheering and clapping. But the shocking part was that they were cheering at me for telling that slut off.
"That wis pumpin' stoatin lassie." (That was fucking brilliant girl) Desmond said as he gave me a pat on the back.
"Are you sure that we aren't like long lost sisters or something because I love you for doing that and I already liked you before she came in here." Nova commented.
"Ah swear oan mah lee ah didnae shag wi' her" (I swear on my life I did not have sex with her.) Kyran says as he puts his hand on my hips and pulls me closer to him. "'N' ye'r richt ye dae ken someone that likes yer curvaceously succulent body" (And you're right you do know someone that likes your curvaceously succulent body)
I place my hand on his chest. His very soft velvet covered hard muscular chest barely protected by his shirt. "Mmm slow yer roll thare mr. Mccabe lets gang back tae oor chat that wis sae rudely interrupted." (Mmm slow your roll there Mr. McCabe lets go back to our conversation that was so rudely interrupted.)
