welcome to the void

- 5 -

'Why are you sad?'

Maybe because my life is either very monotonous, or as chaotic as it can get. There is no in between.
Just like this sadness, which feels like an infinite cycle. Like falling into a never-ending water well with no ledges on its sides to stop yourself from falling.
I can't take a break from life, there are no ledges, no time-outs to catch me and tell me it's okay to take a few days off. Because what if I would do that? Take a few days off?

Then the enormous pile of school assignments and plannings to study would rise and rise and rise until I couldn't see the top of it anymore until it would finally topple over and
f
a
l
l
down on me.

Like I said, there is no in between.
It's take it or leave it,
continue or quit entirely
pretend to be okay or break down.