"Listen sweetheart I'm not speaking in metaphors I'm a literal hell hound H-E-L-L hound. I thought you were supposed to be some miracle therapist or something"
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"Look as m...
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A few murders later...
"Lucifer I think Chloe is starting to figure out what we are" I say climbing through her open window. "So what if she does it will just make things more interesting" he says and I laugh "yes it will be so interesting when she dies because of y-" "hush hush dear Emily we don't want her to hear us just yet do we?" He asks and I let out an uncomfortable growl.
"She's in the shower" I say hearing the water. "Doesn't take superhuman hearing to guess that one darling" he says and I open Chloe's fridge. "Hm. How unconventional" I say looking through all her cabinets "she doesn't have any bloody alcohol!" I groan grabbing a few eggs.
"I'll make an omelette I'm starving" I say and Lucifer shakes his head "you? cook?" He says and I laugh shaking my head "5 years here of course I know how to cook" I say and he shrugs.
30 minutes later
"She's out" I mutter and Lucifer sighs setting up the table.
She walks into the living room in a towel with a gun. "Hello love" I greet and she turns around in surprise her towel dropping. "Well then... you could have just said hi but this works" I say tilting my head to the side. "Emily? Lucifer? What the hell?" She yells and Lucifer steps forward.
"Good morning detective" he says and she picks up her towel again and I Laugh. "what the hell you doing here?" She asks and Lucifer smirks. "Setting the table" he says and she looks around "you broke into my house" she says and I step forward to correct her "actually you left the back window open" I say and she looks to me weirdly "it's 6 meters off the ground!" She says and I sigh.
"Hope you don't mind we made a little brekkie you took forever in the shower what do you do there?" He asks and I nod in agreement, "you two are unbelievable" she says and I smile "oh thank you, but see you should take the compliment. Really turned Things up since 'Hot tub high school' haven't we ding-dong"Lucifer says and she scoffs.
"Oh i'm going to shoot you "she says spitefully and he laughs. "Don't tease, do it. I'm immortal remember. Do you have truffle oil?" He says and she puts a hand on her hip. "Emily Lucifer, get out of my house "she says and Lucifer shakes his head. "We haven't eaten yet" he argues and she shakes her head "get out "she demands and he turns to her "what about the new case "he asks and she sighs "there is no case" she says and I groan.
"damn that's a shame" I mutter and the front door opens to revile detective douche and the offspring. She runs up to me and Lucifer hugging us and we both jump. "Lucifer! Emily!" She says happily "offspring" I greet and Lucifer gives her food and she leaves. "what in gods name are you doing here "he asks me and Lucifer and I scoff.
"Nothing in his name actually just me and Emily here" he says and I nod "hello Douche" I greet him and he ignores me "don't worry I was just here to watch" I tell him and he glares at me and I look to Lucifer "what did I say?" I ask confused and Lucifer shrugs.
