𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐬 ☾ 𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞

12 | realization

I listened to a shit ton of Green Day when I was writing this.

eddie couldn't stand to be alone. he "slept" with his inhaler close to him that night. he couldn't even sleep knowing that his mother would kill him if he was seen with richie, and that richie was in a coma. he wanted to sneak out and tell richie it was going to be okay an hug him and hold his hand. he truly did love richie, even if he didn't know it yet.

he cried so much.

and richie, well, richie was unconscious. he didn't know what was happening. everything was pitch black. subconsciously, he was wondering whether eddie was okay. but he didn't know it yet.

his parents were in the waiting room, crying. his mother was leaning on his father's shoulder, both worried sick. the world was ending for them, and eddie, and the rest of the losers club.

-

the phone rang around 5 AM the next morning. eddie made sure that his mother was asleep before he answered the call. it was bill.

"h-hiya e-eddie." bill was definitely crying, eddie could hear it in his voice crack.

"hi bill." eddie tried to hide the fact that he was awake all night, crying, but bill knew.

"h-have you h-h-heard from r-richie y-yet?" bill choked out.

"no," eddie sniffled, "i assume you haven't either."

"n-no," bill replied, "i even called h-his p-p-parents, th-they've been in the h-hospital w-waiting for h-him a-all night."

"oh," and eddie couldn't take it. he started crying hysterically over the phone.

"e-eddie, is e-everything okay?!" bill mentally cursed himself for saying that because he knew exactly why eddie was crying.

"n-no, bill i just want him to be okay," he said between loud sobs, "i love him so much." he whispered.

"i'm coming, eddie."

"bill wai—"

bill abruptly hung up and rode his bike to eddie's house. he knocked quietly on the window, knowing how crazy mrs. k was.

eddie quietly opened the window and helped bill into his room. both of them were crying, but eddie was most distraught of the two.

"eddie it's gonna be okay. richie's gonna be okay, and he's gonna be so happy to see you." bill didn't stutter once.

eddie nodded and cried into bill's shoulder while bill held the puny boy in his arms.

"bill?"

"y-yeah?"

"i'm glad you exist."

"i'm glad you exist, too, eddie."

they stayed like this for a long, long time. then bill randomly said,

"eddie, i think you're in love with richie."

eddie wiped his tears with his thumb. "bullshit." he protested.

"bull n-not shit," bill lightened the mood, "he cares a lot about you, and y-you c-care a lot about h-him."

"doesn't mean we're in love with each other." eddie spat.

"you guys have definitely got a thing for each other." bill smiled.

"your stutter went away." eddie noticed, trying to change the subject.

"and you're blushing." bill grinned and pointed to eddie's pink cheeks.

"i am not blushing!" eddie whisper yelled.

"and richie doesn't wanna fuck you senseless." the taller boy snickered as eddie's cheeks turned a dark crimson red.

"f-fuck you!"

bill started laughing hysterically, "richie will do that."

"i'm going to fucking kill you."

bill ruffled eddie's hair. "tell you what," he said, "when richie wakes up, we'll ask him."

"bill! no!" eddie was furious at this point.

"alright alright! you didn't think i would spill your secret, did you?"

"what fucking secret?"

"that you and richie did you know what!"

"bill what has gotten into you?"

"i have no idea." bill chuckled.

eddie thought about what bill said for a second. it was entirely possible that he was in love with richie trashmouth tozier. he made him feel all jumpy and jittery inside. richie always seemed so attractive to him, inside and out. richie always loved him and protected him with his life, and richie cared about him a lot. every time he was in the same place as richie, he had this strange urge to hold his hand, and richie felt the same way about eddie. was it just friendship, eddie thought, or was it love?

this time, he didn't shake the thought out of his head. this time, he tapped bill on the shoulder and said:

"i'm in love with richie tozier."