105 Miles Per Hour

The going got easier after she was out of the traffic caused by the accident. It was all she was able to do to keep from giving in to her emotions. She was just ignoring them, better to be numb than sobbing. Just like it's better to be dead than living.

She has about 4 miles left in the neighborhood, before she could get to the old highway and continue. She just keeps going, blaring music that had meaningless words. She saw a reoccurring theme with the part of the neighborhood she was driving by. They were all older, meaning the youngest looked to be in their mid 60's. She saw some of them trying to do some light yard work. Others getting the mail. One caught her attention. It was an old man probably in his late eighties or early nineties. He was out reading while sitting on his porch swing.

Curiosity got the best of her as she kept watching him; his house getting closer and closer. Until she sees him try to get up but fall to the ground. She saw him saying something, she could nearly assume that it was him asking for help. She didn't see anyone come out of the house to help, or any of the neighbors paying him any attention. So when she came up to where his house was she pulled into the driveway and got out of her car to try to help.

"Could someone help me stand up please?" He was calmly asking. He didn't seem to be in relatively any pain, which is very good. Means he probably didn't break any hips or anything.

Once Jade is by the man's side she decides to ask a question to make sure he's okay to stand up."Sir, are you okay? Does anything hurt?"

He responds very coherently for an old person who's just fallen. "I'm fine, I have metal hips." He chuckles and continues. "My knees just aren't the best they've been, although both of my kneecaps are metal. I just need help gettin back up."

Jade was satisfied by his answer so she carefully helped him up. Once she had helped him sit back down on his porch swing and was retrieving his book, she asked what his name was.

"My name's Ray, and thank you so much for helping me. It happens every once in a while and eventually I have to call 911, because no one else will help, not my neighbors, not any drivers, and I live alone since my wife passed about a month ago. Oh, and I don't call emergency services because I'm injured just because I need help up. They always make me go to the ER." Ray rolls his eyes at the last bit.

"So you fall often? Maybe you should get a service dog or something to alert someone who can help, or can help." Jade tries to add helpfully.

"I don't have the kind of money for that, and besides, I've lived a full life, I'm not sure I'll be around much longer. I wouldn't wanna do that to someone. You know? Like getting attached and then leaving them." Ray dismisses her idea.

"Oh," is all Jade can really say.

"Yeah, I actually almost didn't make it this far in my life, but someone stopped me from doing the unthinkable. I was just so sad and distraught and my home life didn't help. Luckily for my future, a stranger talked me out of it; I was gonna jump off a bridge. If no one would've stopped me, I would've missed out on the best parts of life. Like falling in love, having children, and growing old with the love of my life."

Jade's surprise isn't hidden very well. She doesn't want anyone to talk her out of it so she rushes with an excuse to get back in her car. "I need to get going, my mom's waiting for me. Maybe I'll see you sometime, but if I don't I wish you the best."

"Thank you, young lady. What was your name again?" Ray asks as she's backing out of the conversation.

"It's Jade, but I really have to go now, or she'll be worried."

With that Jade just walks briskly back to her car and backs out of the driveway. She has to do this quickly before his words get to her. It's already dark out, so she knows she wasted hours she didn't need to. Within 10 minutes she's out of the neighborhood and on the highway, going 105 miles per hour. This is it, she made it. She was going to do it. She turned the radio up as loud as it would go. She planned to wait until a song she cared about came on, then she'd do it.

In between songs on the radio station she's listening to, her favorite, they say something that catches her attention. She doesn't turn it up louder, because it's up all the way, but she does pay extra attention to it's words.

"This type of thing normally doesn't happen with our station, 103.5, but this seems to be a special circumstance. I was just called on one of the lines and asked to give this urgent message. Jade, if you're listening, please come back home. I saw that piece of paper you threw away. I saw the rules of your plan. If I knew you were feeling this, I would've been around more often. I'm sorry and I promise if you come back, I'll be there for you. Just please come back. Please, Jade.

Jade has tears streaming down her face. She's both mad that it seems like nobody cares until the end, but also sad that she never had a chance of friendship with Katrina. The madness makes her want to do it more, but the words Katrina told the radio station seemed genuine. For the first time in this whole trip, she wonders if she's doing the right thing.

After turning off the radio, to do some serious thinking, she changes her mind. She wants a chance to be friends with Katrina, she wants to fall in love, have kids, and grow old with her love. She wants a full life. So she slows down, and maps her way back to her house.

She's nearly back to the apartment, but she is blinded by somebody's highbeam headlights. She doesn't see that traffic has slowed in front of her, and rams into the car in front of her.

She didn't even have time to be sorry or realize her mistake before she sees her mom. She's wearing exactly what Jade thought she would be. She looked angelic. She didn't look a day older than she did right before she had Jade. She had beautiful long brown hair, and striking blue eyes. The picture didn't do her any justice. She reached for her mother's embrace as she lost all consciousness.