Trying to Escape the Hunt

The phone call

The next month and a half was pretty much hell. I didn't understand exactly what was happening after the diagnoses. I hadn't felt weird, everything for me was completely normal. Afterwards, when they put me on bed-rest is when things started getting bad. Spencer didn't like leaving me alone while he went to work but the fact that a nurse came by twice a day made him feel better about it. The medication they put me on helped with the blood pressure but not with my issues concerning addiction. I don't know if it was the drug itself or just the action of popping the pill in my mouth every morning. Whenever the time came that I needed to take it I felt the familiar burning sensation in my arms. Begging me to relieve the pain like I used to. I didn't tell Spencer though.

I didn't want him to worry, not when it was something that I could handle on my own. I knew that if he thought for even a second that I had a chance of relapsing then he would never leave me alone. Not until the cravings subsided completely. Every time I felt the burning itch start, I would lean on my arm and focus all of my energy on anything else. It didn't matter what.

Despite all of his out of town jobs, Spencer has been able to make every doctors appointment. I'm not sure how but he has. They have been calling me in every week to make sure that everything was going like it was supposed to. They were giving me steroids to make her lungs grow faster, they measured her size every week and were trying to put off the C-section as long as they could, they wanted to make sure that both of lived though this. The really scary thing was that she wasn't growing like they said she should. She was moving very slow and it didn't help with my worrying. I still wasn't showing that alone was unsettling it didn't matter how much the doctor and Spencer explained to me that due to her size and how physically fit I am it made sense that I wasn't showing. As far as I'm concerned I should be about to pop.

Spencer was very excited to hear that we were having a girl. I know he was a little worried abut having a boy. He didn't tell me exactly how he felt about the whole thing but I knew that it had something to do with his father. I wanted to ask him about it but at the same time didn't want to make him upset, not when him and I didn't have much time together. I myself was more worried about having a girl vs having a boy. I could deal with boys all day and night but a girl was on a whole different level.

Spencer calls me every hour, on the hour when he was away. He had already threatened to call the paramedics if I didn't answer. He wasn't playing around, not with this. It got kind of old real quick but at the same time it was really sweet and I looked forward to his call. Before he left he always made sure that there was plenty of food for me. One of the only kind of good things that happened was the fact that Gideon didn't travel nearly as much as Spencer so he has been spending a lot of time here keeping me company.

When Spencer came home I was half asleep. Something that I've been doing a lot, it's not like I had much else to do. He looked a hell of a lot more tired then he normally did. I was awake enough to know that it was him, but asleep enough not to move when he came in the room. I heard the bathroom door open and him turn on the shower. When he got out I heard his phone beep and him sigh. He got dressed and left again.

All Spencer wanted to do was go home and go to sleep. He hadn't even been at work today. He had to finish up things at the academy. They were reviewing his work in the field and making sure that they made the right choice in waving most of the fitness requirements. He had been stressing about it all day, if they decided that it wasn't working then he would be out of a job and there isn't any way he would be able to support Addison's medical bills and especially not a baby who had a very high chance of needing special medical care after being born.