dominant||phan[book 1]

18

dan paced back and forth, in the apartment hall he knew so well. he was debating if he was going to knock on phil's door. he sighed, he hadn't been back in his apartment since the night that they fell out.  honestly he hadn't been in the apartment building in a while, since he began picking up more shifts. the only time he had came back home was to take care of Bear. dan knew that things could be fixed, but he didn't know if it was too late. he sighed, and took a deep breath. he held his breath, and knocked upon the door that stood before him. his eyes then met once bright blue ones. 

"oh, hi dan." phil said, awkwardly breaking eye contact. "um, why are you here?"

"jensen told me to talk to you."

"well come on in, i guess."

dan walked in, and sat down on the couch. he began to look around, noticing the apartment was almost empty. he saw boxes with writing on it, but the one that caught his eye was the one labeled dan. he noticed phil look at him, as he got up. he went towards, and carefully opened it. 

"phil what is this?" dan asked. 

"this is all your stuff you left here, back from when you practically lived here in april." phil chuckled, rubbing the back of his head. 

"you still kept it all this time, and didn't even give it back?"

"i thought maybe if i kept it, you'd come back." 

"all you had to do was ask, but what about jensen. didn't you have him?" dan questioned.

"remember that night you told me you never wanted to see me again? well jensen and i didn't start-you know-until after that.  even then i was more focused on you." 

"oh,phil." dan said, with tears in his eyes. "all i wanted was you. i was just afraid."

"why were you afriad?"

dan wiped away his tears, and sat back in his seat. he began to think. the reason he was afraid was a long and personal story that he didn't really want to get into at the moment. you see, dan really wasn't an open person. he didn't just wake up one day and decide to live the life he has today. little and big events of dan's past lead him to this exact moment. dan then began to think about his past, which caused him to break down again. he soon felt some one rubbing his back.

"hey, hey, hey. don't worry dan." phil began to whisper in his ear. "it's okay. everything will be okay."

"how can you be sure? all every one says is that it's going to be okay, but it never is!" 

"dan, listen to me." phil replied, trying to calm dan down. "as long as i'm here, it will be fine. i'm never going to leave you again."

phil wrapped his arms around dan's thin, frail figure. it was obivous that the drug use, had cased dan to lose weight, which made phil's heart break. phil then took his thumb and wiped the tears that rolled down dan's face. phil was in the moment, and kissed dan. dan melted into the kiss, soon laying back on the couch to allow phil to get on top on him. phil began to kiss down dan's neck, stopping at his exposed collar bone,where he left a hickey, causing dan to moan. phil's hands began to fumble with the button of dan's jeans, and that's when dan stopped it. 

"phil stop." dan spoke. phil sat up and looked at him.

"what's wrong? why do you want to stop?" phil asked. 

"i came here to talk phil, not to have sex!"

"why though? you were all for making out, but once something was about to happen you freaked."

"what ever phil, you're just like him."

"i'm just like who?"

dan began to get up and gathered his things. he then walked out of the apartment, with phil following him. 

"where are you going dan?" phil asked 

"i'm going home." but as dan unlocked the door of his apartment , and bear came running out. dan and phil ran after the dog, but all they saw when they got to the lobby was an older woman.

"excuse me, have you seen a dog?" phil asked the woman.

"oh, i'm sorry but he ran out the door as i opened it." she replied.

"thank you."

"i'd hurry, it's about to rain!" she yelled, as the men ran out the door.

the sky was gray, being that it was always raining, but just today they hoped for good weather. of course that did not happen. soon water began to fall from the clouds. dan didn't know how bad it was supposed to get, but he was determined to find his dog. through all the hardships in the past six months the only thing dan had was bear. he loved that dog more than anything. 

"dan, i think we should stop." phil spoke. "it's pouring."

"no, phil we have to keep looking. i can't lose him, he's all i got." dan began to cry.

"hey, look at me." phil said, looking into dan's sad brown eyes. "no matter what you got me."

"no you've got other people to worry about. you don't care about me."

"dan, why can't you see i'm in fucking love with you! okay, right when i met you there was something special about you, even when we were apart i always thought of you. i wondered if you were okay, and every night i'd pray to anything, even though i don't believe in that stuff, that you won't overdose or die. okay, so never say that i don't care about you because i need you. there, i said it." phil replied, with a sigh. 

"y-you're in love with me?"

"yes i am, and i unterstand if you don't-"

"phil."

"what?"

"just shut up." dan said, as he smashed his lips to phil's.

phil began to kiss back, and tangled his fingers in dan's soaked hair. it was something speical you could say, dan had final gotten the boy but something was missing. at that moment dan felt something nudge at his leg.

"bear!" dan screamed out."oh my god, never do that again boy."

with that, they were all together again. it was small, and broken, but they were family, and they were going to the only place they had ever known, home.

_

okay like always this is unedited so sorry for mistakes. but i would like to say there is only 2 chapters left, which is a normal chapter and then the epilogue. i've said this a couple times but there will be a sequel, and you find more things out about both dan and phil's past.