calpurnia

let's just move on

(continuation of last chapter.)

i stared at them in disbelief. the way he held her hand, the way he smiled when he was around her, the way he loved her.
in that moment, i couldn't do anything but stay frozen, i wanted to scream and cry but nothing came out. i wanted to punch and kick things but i had no energy, i was weak, i let my guard down, and i let this happen. was it my fault? did he get bored with me? what was i supposed to do? i sat there in a cafe, tears filling my eyes, staring at somebody that i thought i knew like the back of my hand. "miss, are you okay? do you need something to drink?" a waitress asked. "um, yeah, can i have a cookie please?" i said wiping the tears from my eyes. "yes of course, i'll have it right over." she said putting her pocketbook away. she left and brought me back my cookie, i thanked her and paid her what i owed. i continued staring at them, how she was prettier, she was skinner, she was everything i wasn't. i quietly sobbed as i looked at them. finn looked up and saw me, oh shoot. his eyes quickly glanced over, and he saw me. my puffy eyes, the dried tears being covered by new ones, me. he began to silently freak out as i began to walk away. "no- cas wait up!" he yelled. i pretended i didn't hear and continued walking. "please cas, please don't go!" he yelled chasing after me. i began walking faster, he finally caught up and grabbed by shoulder. "acacia, please, it wasn't what it loo-" i interrupted him. "yes it was, now leave. i don't want you, i won't miss you, you were just waiting for me to put out, weren't you? i loved you finn. it just wasn't meant to be."

and with her last words, his heart shattered.