Thinking big

Chapter 3. My thoughts - enemies

I have been asked a lot of times by a lot of people what makes me calm... So practically what makes me happy. To be honest, I've never known how to answer it, so I always raised my shoulders, seeming uninterested.

Classic music - symphonies - used to left me astonishingly calm, usually. And it still does, equally, it doesn't particularly calm me down, but it is also helpful, may be it's just my case, but it helps me. To sell you a point, I use to take my afternoon sleep for what feels like 2 hours, listening to classic music ( Mozart and Haydn especially ). It helps my memory, and improves my IQ. I also listen music when I study; it's alright as classic music doesn't have any lyrics to disturb you, and actually, based on scientific studies, it larges the percentage of your concentration, making you more efficient.

Certainly, the taste in music it's an arguable domain, so my statement doesn't remain nothing but a non-offensive viewpoint, but I'm deviating from the main subject. 

Why did I call my thoughts 'enemies'? Well, they theoretically destroy merciless my mind, my memory.. they change the way I think minute by minute, and they make me see any things in multiple different ways, thus making me harder to integrate in society, and to find people like me. They make me different, they split me apart - despite all my efforts - from the other people of the same age as me.

Because over-thinking leads to social skills problems, as you can see clearly as day, I may be a friendly person yet it's hard for me to keep a stable friendship. My stupid mind 'taught' me the fact that I should have more expectations from a friend and to think twice ( as I don't do it hundreds ) before making one.

Now, what can't be lied about is the fact that I try to surround myself as more as possibly with people I find ( or my mind does ) intellectually stimulating. What I know best to do is to think. If a friend can't stimulate myself to do the best, than he/she doesn't have my interest anymore. I need someone's ( a friend, may be ) help to make me reach and increase a considerate cognitive development during our either short, or long lasting friendship. Of course this does nothing, but making me have a hard time finding right people to hang out with. And I regret it since the day I realized how tortuous a human being's mind can possibly be, taking as example my own one.

Theoretically, if we should go dipper in the subject, there are high schools, for example, where being social matters as much as your GPA. That may seem unfair, a little bit... and non-sensed ( I couldn't stop myself ), but that's how the education system seems to evolve in each part of the world, more or less... Thus, your carrier could turn out to be really collapsed by a foolishness as over-thinking, and for people like me who cares and THINK a lot about future and implicit carrier, it represents a significant matter. I am very exposed to this kind of failure in my life, and there is not such thing as 'How to get rid of over-thinking', and if it will ever be, I bet it won't work on me, because I already got used to it. And I know it because I started to like it, somehow.

 

Yep, from as much as I can observe, it took me less than I expected, but I'll offset with the 4th Chapter. 

Keep an eye on so you wouldn't miss a new chapter of my endless thoughts!