yuri.chr

35 0 0
                                    

If you found this note in a small wooden box with a heart on it, then *congratulations!* You are probably the first person to read this. I didnt really plan on sharing this with anybody, but for some reason I think its exciting that somebody out there, a complete stranger, will come across this note and read my story. Someone I will never meet, sharing such a personal bond with me. Im fascinated that either one of us could die - even as soon as tomorrow - with the other being completely clueless to the fact. To you, my entire life is within this note, and so I will live for as long as your memory can carry me. Writing this, Im wondering if that makes you feel fascinated or violated. Its so exciting.

Im sorry if my story is a bit disorganized, but Id like to get it down while its still fresh on my mind. First, Ill tell you a little bit about myself. Im a first-year college girl and have led, by most standards, a pretty unspectacular life up to this point. I grew up in an upper-middle class school district with decent teachers. I did track in middle school and some of high school, and Ive had two boyfriends. Now, Im studying for a career in occupational therapy, because I feel the field is undervalued and provides tremendous help to people.

Im giving you this background because theres this strange misconception that if you want to kill someone then youre either sick in the head or you have anger management issues. But, its very apparent that I dont fall into either of those categories. Its true that most murder cases are in a domestic setting where someone loses control of their anger or something. But the thing is that those people kill under provocation, whether by a singular outburst or by a slow-burning series of misfortunes. Those people kill because in that brief moment, they want a specific someone, for a specific reason, to be hurt or killed.

What Im talking about is wanting to kill someone for no specific reason, maybe just to see what its like. Do you ever get that? I wouldnt know how others feel, because its not something I ever talked about. But Ive been curious about what its like to kill someone ever since I was a child. Not killing anyone in particular, just a random person. Its always just fascinated me that if I put my mind to it, I can approach anyone, and in five minutes they would be completely gone from this Earth.

But Ive never done so for a couple of reasons. First of all, for most of my life it was logistically impossible for me to do it without getting caught. I only got my drivers license a couple years ago, and even then, the preparations would take too much time, definitely stirring suspicion. It was only once I started college that I realized this was no longer an obstacle.

Another reason is that I was afraid of causing harm to too many people. You might laugh reading that, at how hypocritical it sounds. But, let me explain: Why should I feel bad about killing someone if theyre too dead to care? Who would I be feeling bad for? Contrarily, its the grief of the living that Id rather not be responsible for. Because of this, I knew it would take a good deal of research before finding a suitable person to kill, and Ive never had the means to do so - again, until I started college.

And now, having just experienced it, Id say it was pretty satisfying in the end. Something I would try again? Probably not, since my curiosity has already been satisfied. It really wouldnt be the same a second time.

But anyway, if by any chance youre also curious to kill someone, then youre welcome to take notes. :)

***

I started a hobby of people-watching soon after I entered college. People-watching is interesting to me because its taking one of the infinite extras in your life and turning them into a main character - without them knowing, of course. Its so easy to forget that every single one of the hundreds of strangers you pass every day has a life story as deep and complex as your own. One thing I noticed about people-watching, and wanting to kill someone, is that you are in more constant awareness of this. When I find a person to observe, their story slowly becomes more clear to me over time, gaps being filled - it really is amazing.

You've reached the end of published parts.

⏰ Last updated: Dec 17, 2017 ⏰

Add this story to your Library to get notified about new parts!

CreepyPasta's StoriesWhere stories live. Discover now