My Love, Cheese Whizz.

Life isn't like a bottle of cheese whizz...Cheese whizz is far greater.

First Love

We never forget that first love,

Whether it was in kindergarten,

Or in the local grocery store.

Whether it has to do with a person,

Or a can of Cheese Whizz.

It is said that God did not create perfection,

But God had forgotten Cheese Whizz.

That cheesy deliciousness

That overwhelming, mind oozing, ear-pleasing, beautiful, BEAUTIFUL, sound,

Of the Cheese Whizz can.

"Pshhhhhhhh"

Those delectable, cheesy preservatives.

I get more cravings for this can of easy cheese,

Then I do for any person.

Because people can hurt you, mentally and physically,

While all Cheese Whizz can do,

Is give me type 2 diabetes

Or shorten my lifespan

Oh cheese whizz, how I love thee

Let me state thy ways,

How your can goes *shk shk* when I shake you,

How I adore your yellow #5,

That lights my way with its neon artificial brightness

Oh, how my heart aches more when we are apart,

Then when I feast on your pesticides

Oh, cheese whizz, how I would rather have your trans fats,

Over a fully balanced meal.

People ask me,

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"Do you have plans for your life?"

"Do you know what you want to do when you grow up?"

And my answer is no.

But I have cheese whizz

And cheese whizz has me.

Who would rather have to deal with the depression of reality, the stress, and pressure from your decisions, the unknowing of if you will be living on the street by next week,

Then instead of drowning your sorrows in a can of cheese whizz?

You normal people out there ask me, question me, and ponder why I write about cheese whizz,

And my reason is that pouring that can of E-Z processed cheese,

Is easier than making my life choices

Enjoying that crunch of a Ritz cracker with a cheese whizz mountain taller than Mt.Everest,

Is one of the most pleasurable things I have had in my lifetime.

So don't diss cheese whizz, because it clearly has a brighter future than you with its bright, neon, yellow #5.