The Pilot's Lover • Collins (Dunkirk)

Seventeen.

(Betty's POV)

One day.
It had been one whole day since I last saw him.
Every second which passed stung my heart more and more.
It felt like centuries since I had last heard his voice,  it seemed to be driving me crazy.

Maybe he's already forgotten about me.

Maybe he's got somebody else.

Maybe he doesn't actually care and was just using me to get through it all.

Thoughts like these raced through my head.

I hadn't left my room all day, I couldn't.
Similarly when the sun rose, I didn't even want to wake up.
My curtains were drew shut, I couldn't even bare to look at the sun; everything just seemed to remind me of him.

I wanted to sleep all the pain away.
I didn't know that something as tiny as love could cause so much pain.

"Bee? C'mon. You've got to come out"
The familiar banging on my door interrupted my silent sobbing.
My brother had been trying to persuade me to come out of my bedroom all day.
He'd bribed me with everything ; from clothes to chocolate.
I declined every time.

"No, I don't feel like it; sorry"
I'd been responding the same way all day.
I know it seems foolish to have been so upset but I couldn't help it, I needed to be with him. I needed to be able to love him in person.

"The letter"
I gasped.

"The letter!"
I was shouting now.

"The letter!"
I raced down the stairs and breathlessly asked my mother.

"The piece of paper you picked up. Where did you put it?"
I asked, panting like a wild animal.

"On the fireplace. Why?"
She responded confused.

"Thank you"
I sighed, kissed her on the cheek, then ran into the front room.

"No running in the house!"
She shouted from behind

Ignoring her shouts, I swiped the paper off the fireplace and raced back upstairs.

I fumbled around in my drawer.
"Pen,paper,pen,paper"
I chanted to myself.
Useless junk flew out of the drawer and onto my floor, while I dug for the writing utilities.

"Looking for these?"
Peter approached me from the doorway.

"Yes. Thanks Pee."
I wiped the sweat off my forehead and pretty much snatched the pen and paper from my brother.

He shook his head, cracking a smile.

I immediately started to write, spilling out my inner thoughts.

To my dearest love, Collins.

It has been a day.
Although that is all it has been, it feels so much more than that.

All these seconds passing, they feel like sharp knives, stabbing my heart. It hurts to not be with you.

Without you, I feel completely lost. You may not feel the same way but I do miss you deeply.