Random things that come to my head randomly

Convos I heard Today

1. Person 1: F*ck should I get the knife or the plushy
Person 2: Our daughter is 7 get the plushie.

2.
Smol Child: "Mum what if Santa's clothes were originally white but they are red cause he killed all the naughty kids."

3. "WHERE ARE THE MALTEASERS?!"
They said as the ran around in woolworths

4. Santa dude: What do you want for christmas?
Child: A unicorn
Santa Dude: Ah you see that lady over there took the last unicorn maybe next year.
Child: but you said that last year.

5. Kid A: So Mum, we need to buy torches and a tent cause we need to camp out and stop people from breaking in.
Mum: Santa?
Kid A: Yes he should be stopped.