Stolen HeART
Six Months of Sunshine and Every Day a Downpour.
"Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it."
Bella POV
I looked towards the open double glass doors like I did every day; the same vision haunted me, even when I didn't intensely watch it. It was there all around me. My future!
The sound of the island pierced my ears and whirled around my head like the aftermath of an explosion. I buried myself deeper into my starched white pillow hoping today it would block out the noise. The smell of the bedding forced me to return to my previous position and I was compelled to watch the view I was so desperate to avoid. I moved slowly across the bed as the droplets of sweat glided down my pale skin and I moved to sit up. The damp feeling underneath me made me feel uncomfortable and as the sun beamed over the brightest blue you could ever imagine, it gave no indication of time or perspective.
This room had become my sanctuary, my prison. It captured the scent of the fresh sea and the fierce wind that only seemed to make an appearance during the night brought the bouquet of the wild tropical surroundings to my open French doors. My weak frame left the oversized bed that would cocoon me one minute and smother me the next and I padded over to the open doors that proudly displayed the view.
These were the moments I cherished, the moments I feared, the loneliness, the peace. I could be myself, no smiles, no falseness, no pretending to care, and no time to watch. The bluest of blue unwontedly greeted me every day. The soft sounding waves made me cringe. The bright colours of this world seemed grey and dark to me. This wasn't paradise, this wasn't a tropical haven. This was hell and it had been my choice to come here.
Loss wasn't a concern. I wanted to be here in this vat of torment. I wanted to be an unapproachable outcast. I wanted to be left alone. My nights filled with numbness, the days of make-believe taking their toll. I didn't think of the loss that everyone thought I was dealing with. I thought of nothing.
Six months of sunshine and every day a down pour.
The gentle breeze cooled my sticky, heated skin and I moved closer to the doors. I looked over at Alice who was frolicking in the calm ocean with Jasper. Her girly squeals and Jasper's deep laugh echoed around the beach. I fell back into the shade and closed my eyes. This Sunday morning it was my turn to have everyone over for breakfast. Not long after we had all settled into our day to day life arrangements were made that every Sunday we would eat together. Though our villas were more or less a couple of miles away from each other, it wasn't a given that we would be living in each other's pockets.
Now that Jasper had set up his own business making furniture, he and Alice were spending more time in town. They had purchased a small holding not far from the small fishing port. Once Jasper had enough pieces of furniture to sell they would open for business. The dynamics of the group had dwindled over the last month or so. Carlisle and Esme had gone to the Seychelles, Rose and Emmett had decided to travel the world and had left for Asia a few weeks ago, and James...James, the only person that had been holding me up had left.
I never saw the shift in our relationship until it was too late. I had wanted so desperately to be the woman he wanted, the woman he deserved and I think with time I could have given him something. I could still hear the pain in his voice as his diluted confession was still clear in my head. I had known for a while that his respect and love for me was deeper, that he saw me differently from what I had seen him, and all those times Edward had confronted me with what was so plain to see had only rung true when we sat by the lake. That day he walked away from me a different person, he freed himself from the prison around us, while I was left in isolation.
